In many countries senior positions have higher salaries compared to those of young workers of the same company. Some people think this is not justified. Do you agree or disagree?

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It is an undeniable fact that wages define the living lifestyle and standard of a person. It is often argued that senior candidates are more highly paid than young staff in the same organization,
this
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trend is followed in numerous nations but some people show disagreement towards
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difference. I completely agree with the given notion, I will support my opinion with examples. Apparently, paying high funds to senior team members holds a wide range of constructive benefits.
To begin
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with, senior employees are highly qualified and well-experienced individuals, they not only perform professional tasks like other team members but
also
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the involvement of
such
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candidates improves the profit of the organization, effortlessly leading multiple groups of the company and their ideas provide long term sustainability which harnesses
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growth of the firm.
For example
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, multinational companies pay high salaries to their old crew because they are more responsible and often maintain positive surroundings.
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, it is apparent why MNCs are paying decent pay to their seniors.
On the other hand
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, the young generation is coming up with innovative ideas and they have better knowledge about recent technologies, which ultimately directly or indirectly helps the organization increase their market value. To illustrate, numerous new advisers suggest new approaches towards a problem which is more effective and less time-consuming, so the package given to them must be the basis of performance and skills or they can
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be rewarded with incentives as well. To recapitulate, seniors are rewarded with higher income than new employees in the same firm, because, they have more responsibilities, and experience and are loyal to the organisation.
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, the salary criteria of the young workforce should not be overlooked either as they are more energetic, and their innovative ideas, problem-solving approach and digital knowledge should be appreciated by paying decent payment.

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coherence and cohesion
Try to provide a clearer distinction between the points in favor of higher salaries for senior employees and those for the younger workforce. Using more clear topic sentences can help with this.
task achievement
Add more specific examples or statistics to back up your arguments regarding both senior and young employees' contributions to the company.
task achievement
Consider addressing counterarguments in more depth to enhance the overall complexity of your argument and show a nuanced understanding of the issue.
content
Your introduction clearly states your position, which is a strong approach for the IELTS essay structure.
content
The recognition of both the benefits of senior employees and the contributions of young workers reflects a balanced argument, showcasing an understanding of the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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