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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The line graph shows the percentage of travels by 4 different transports in one country between 1985 and 2015

The line graph shows the percentage of travels by 4 different transports in one country between 1985 and 2015
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The graph illustrates the proportions of 4
diffierent
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different
mods
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modes
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 of
transports
Fix the agreement mistake
transport
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 in
specific
Correct article usage
a specific
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 country between 1985 and 2015 . It is noticeable that the highest
methods
Fix the agreement mistake
method
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 mostly was travel by car.
in
Linking Words
contrast
Add a comma
contrast,
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 the lowest were
others
Correct quantifier usage
other
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 types
such
Linking Words
 as
,
Remove the comma
apply
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walking and
airplane
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aeroplane
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. Between 1990 and 2003, cars
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
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started at 60% and increased
shaply
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sharply
 to reached almost 80%.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, bus
graduly
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gradually
 decreased by 20% in the same duration of time . From 2010 to 2015, cars still had a higher percentage of
used
Add an article
a used
the used
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 method for travel,
while
Linking Words
approximetly
Correct your spelling
approximately
 no one
use
Replace the word
used
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 bus in 2010.
while
Linking Words
 rail had improved
in
Change preposition
at
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 the same time.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • percentage
  • transport modes
  • trend analysis
  • increase/decrease
  • infrastructure
  • social dynamics
  • economic factors
  • travel patterns
  • data interpretation
  • historical comparison
  • future predictions
  • environmental impact
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