IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

In some countries, most people prefer to rent their houses rather than buy their homes. What are the advantages of renting a home? Should government subsidies house prices for first-time home buyers?

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In the contemporary era, numerous folks tend to rent
houses
Use synonyms
 rather than possess them, as it can help them handle their budgets.
This
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 essay will suggest that saving money and changing
houses
Use synonyms
 easily are the foremost benefits.
Then
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, it will demonstrate
governments
Use synonyms
' roles towards
this
Linking Words
trend
Use synonyms
. Notably, It is noticed that
this
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trend
Use synonyms
 has lots of pros which can be discussed.
To begin
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 with, renting
houses
Use synonyms
 is an opportunity to achieve financial stability, as owning a house is something difficult which can lead inhabitants to take a loan from the bank.
Hence
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,
this
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 will
occur
Verb problem
be
show examples
 a substantial challenge
in repaying
Change preposition
to repay
show examples
 it.
In addition
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,
this
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trend
Use synonyms
 lets people move from one city to another in a simple way. To illustrate, people who rent apartments can contact the original owner to inform them that they are leaving,
thus
Linking Words
, they can collect their stuff and move to their new destinations.
However
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, those who own
houses
Use synonyms
 cannot do that, whether they buy a new house or sell what they own at a satisfying price.
According to
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 the above merits,
governments
Use synonyms
 that aim to increase the rate of selling dwellings should assist families who desire to buy a residence by following some crucial steps.
Firstly
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,
governments
Use synonyms
 should
low
Replace the word
lower
show examples
apartments
Change the noun form
apartment
show examples
 prices for those who are in swinging circumstances.
Besides
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, they can divide the whole amount, so folks can pay in monthly instalments. In conclusion,
this
Linking Words
trend
Use synonyms
 presents a number of merits which involve saving bucks and reducing challenges that
household
Fix the agreement mistake
households
show examples
 face whilst changing their place of settlement.
Moreover
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,
governments
Use synonyms
 should take the above advice into consideration.

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coherence and cohesion
Ensure a smoother flow between paragraphs by using linking phrases more effectively. This will help in guiding the reader through your arguments.
task achievement
When stating advantages, consider providing more detailed examples or personal anecdotes to strengthen your points. This can make your essay more compelling.
grammar and vocabulary
Be mindful of grammatical accuracy and word choice. For instance, 'low apartments prices' should be 'lower apartment prices' for better clarity.
task achievement
The essay clearly identifies the advantages of renting and makes relevant points regarding government support.
coherence and cohesion
Good structure with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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