IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Information technology enables many people to do their work outside their workplace. Do the benefit of this mobility outweigh the disadvantages?

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Nowadays, people tend to
work
Use synonyms
 remotely with the help of information technology. It has many significant advantages
such
Linking Words
 as time saving and flexibility,
however
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, some drawbacks are serious and need to be limited. On the one hand, the most important advantage is
time saving
Add a hyphen
time-saving
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. There is no need to start the day early because of the rash hours and traffic as long as the same
work
Use synonyms
 can be done either at home or the office.
Furthermore
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, working remotely enhances
work
Use synonyms
 outcomes in some sensitive jobs
such
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 as the health field.
For example
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, consultants can meet up at late night to
council
Correct your spelling
counsel
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 about urgent or unusual cases.
Moreover
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, workers will be able to
work
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 depending on their own schedule,
thus
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 boosting their productivity and convenience.
For instance
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, a graphic designer can
work
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 quietly in his home rather than at an office full of distractions.
On the other hand
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, the most fundamental disadvantage is people's isolation. Since meetings will be held online, the worker characteristics will be mostly not recognized. Some of the important skills
such
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 as speaking in public or body language will be depressed.
In addition
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, it is important to mention that a high number of employers will take advantage of their
employee
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employees
show examples
 and force them to
work
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 overtime. In conclusion, information technology can enhance our lives since
work
Use synonyms
 will be less stressful and flexible,
however
Linking Words
, bosses' abuses and teamwork skills limitations should be considered as well.

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task achievement
Consider providing a stronger counterargument to support the position that the disadvantages can outweigh the advantages.
coherence
Try to use more varied linking words and phrases to enhance the flow of your argument.
task achievement
Expand on your examples to provide more context and detail, reinforcing the points you are making.
task achievement
Your introduction clearly presents the topic and outlines both advantages and disadvantages, which is a solid approach.
coherence
You have structured your paragraphs logically with clear topic sentences, making it easy for the reader to follow your argument.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • telecommuting
  • remote work
  • flexible hours
  • work-life balance
  • cost-efficiency
  • carbon footprint
  • global talent pool
  • cybersecurity
  • data breaches
  • virtual collaboration
  • isolation
  • team cohesion
  • performance monitoring
  • accountability
  • hybrid working model
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