Online shopping seems to be replacing the traditional method of buying. However, some buyers are skeptical to this practice. Discuss both benefits and risks associated with online shopping.

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There is no doubt that
traditional
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the traditional
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method is
old
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the old
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way in our life , under
of
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apply
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the
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apply
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continuous technology.
In my
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My
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opinion, I strongly believe that the
Correct your spelling
online
onilne
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online
shopping
its
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is
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so easy
to
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for
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our life and
take
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takes
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the
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apply
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our product in
smart
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a smart
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way , One of the main reasons why some people support
onilne
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online
shopping its
decresess
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decreases
decrease
the
costs
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cost
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not
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and not
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need
use
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to use
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for
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apply
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cars
for going
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to go
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the
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to the
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mall
the
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apply
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online shoopning
its
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apply
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help
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helps
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us in got the products and is
that
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the
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reson
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reason
for incress the profit .
This
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can be explained by the fact that
onilne
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online
shopping
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that
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apply
show examples
is
easy
Add an article
an easy
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method and online and
easer
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easier
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.
For example
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, Amazon
Consequently
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,
this
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leads to People's acceptance
for
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of
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online shopping
On the other hand
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, others believe that risks will
incress
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increase
They argue that online shopping
maybe
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may
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not good
its
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it's
it is
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awful
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due
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because
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to
make
Wrong verb form
makes
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us pay
dont
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and
feel for A clear example of
this
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can be seen in [amazon].
Therefore
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, it can be said that balance
Correct your spelling
is
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its
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is
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the best method for shopping
To conclude
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,
although
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there are convincing arguments on both sides, I believe that online shopping
its
Correct your spelling
is
show examples
the best way its easier in our
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
now . It is essential that be careful about the real website

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coherence and cohesion
Consider expanding on your introduction to more clearly outline the main points that will be discussed. Consider rephrasing some sentences for clarity.
task achievement
Make sure to provide specific examples to strengthen your arguments. For instance, you mentioned Amazon but didn’t explain how it illustrates your point.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph contains a clear main idea and supporting sentences that enhance understanding. Some sentences seem fragmented or unclear.
task achievement
The essay presents a clear opinion on online shopping and acknowledges opposing views, which contributes to a balanced discussion.
coherence and cohesion
You used some relevant vocabulary related to the topic, which is good for showing your language range.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • unparalleled convenience
  • vast selection
  • digital platforms
  • comparison shopping
  • impulsive buying
  • aggressive marketing tactics
  • risk of fraud
  • counterfeit goods
  • compromised personal data
  • immediate satisfaction
  • physical examination
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