IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Some people feel that global warming should be dealt with by governments. Others feel that it is responsibility of individuals in society to solve the problem. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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Global warming has
been become
Change to the active voice
become
show examples
 a pressing concern in today's world. Some people contend
tha
Correct your spelling
that
 it is the duty of higher authorities to deal with it
whereas
Linking Words
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
show examples
 assert that it should
also
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 be done by human beings.
This
Linking Words
 essay will delve into both the views
along with
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 my own perspective in forthcoming paragraphs. Proponents of the first view argue that
Use synonyms
Government
Correct article usage
the Government
show examples
 has the autonomy and power to change the world by implementing strict rules and regulations that
person
Correct article usage
a person
show examples
 has no option but to follow
that
Correct determiner usage
those
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 rules. Another significant reason is working as a higher authority, they have sufficient funds and resources by which they can raise awareness regarding rising
environment
Replace the word
environmental
show examples
concerms
Correct your spelling
concerns
such
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 as global warming. A study revealed that in 2003 the Indian
government
Use synonyms
 organized a campaign aimed at
alleviate
Wrong verb form
alleviating
show examples
environment
Replace the word
environmental
show examples
 problems.
As a result
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, they
encounterd
Correct your spelling
encountered
encounter
 almost 49% reduction in emissions. Critics argue that it should
also
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 solved at
human
Add an article
a human
the human
show examples
 level. As it is
Correct article usage
a concerne
show examples
concerne
Correct your spelling
concerned
concern
 for all, solely
Use synonyms
government's
Correct article usage
the government's
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 steps cannot make a difference. Everyone should come
at
Change preposition
to
show examples
 ground level to see its impact on the present and future generations. Another key factor contributing to
this
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 is it allows people to have
direct
Add an article
a direct
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 impact on their surroundings, fostering a sense of ownership and achievement. Take
an
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 example of Brazil, They have set a target of zero emissions by 2050. In conclusion,
according to
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 me, both
government
Use synonyms
 and personal steps should be taken to solve the issue of global
emission
Fix the agreement mistake
emissions
show examples
. Solely, it will not make a difference.

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language
Address minor grammatical errors, such as 'has been become' which should be 'has become', and 'the duty of higher authorities' rather than 'of higher authorities'.
coherence
Ensure to use transitions more fluently between paragraphs and further elaborate on examples provided to enhance clarity.
task response
In your conclusion, you may want to reiterate the key points discussed in the essay to strengthen your final argument.
content
You presented a balanced view of both perspectives, which is essential for this type of prompt.
support
Your examples, although needing more detail, demonstrate an attempt to support your arguments effectively.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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