IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

Some believe that people today have no interest in maintaining the traditional culture of their country or region. Others believe that it is still important to people that we preserve a traditional way of life. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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Nowadays , many argue that some nations have no passion for keeping the
cultures
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 of
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thier
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their
 countries ,
while
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 others
bileve
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believe
that is
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nessecarly
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necessary
 to preserve their
traditional
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traditions
show examples
 and
culture
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.
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This
this
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 essay will discuss both
percpectivie
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perspective
perspectives
 before presenting my own opinion . On the
hand
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other hand
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 , most
individualls
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individuals
 prefer to
foucs
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focus
 on work and
bussinuess
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business
 rather than trying to keep their
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cultures
Fix the agreement mistake
culture
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,
However
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 , they dont need to waste their time on
such
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of
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apply
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these
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apply
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things
for example
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 , Art or painting .
In addition
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 , most of these people
presuming
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presume
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 that preserving the traditional
culture
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 is
responsable
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the responsibility
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by
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of
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 governments not
by
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apply
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individualls
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individuals
.
On the other hand
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 , people
bileve
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believe
 that governments ,
cummunities
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communities
 and
socity
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society
 must coouaprition
toogether
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together
 to regain
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thier
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their
 missing
cultures
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 and keep
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thier
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their
 present
traditional
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traditions
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.
Furthermore
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 ,
History
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 is a main factor especially when it comes to
traditional
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traditions
show examples
 and
culture
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, so ,if
their
Correct pronoun usage
they
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 can keep
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thier
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their
traditional
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traditions
show examples
 and
culture
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 they
are
Wrong verb form
will be
show examples
succesed
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successful
on
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in
show examples
 preserving their
history
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 . In my opinion , I think preserving
cultures
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 can help people and governments to protect
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thier
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their
 whole
history
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 .Because
,
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apply
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every
habbit
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habit
 from our traditional
is represent
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represents
show examples
 a part of our
history
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 and so on for
cultures
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 . The primary example of
importance
Add an article
the importance
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to keep
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of keeping
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 traditional
culture
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 is EXPO and we can see how it was
effected
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affected
show examples
 in the best way
on
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in
show examples
 all countries around the world.

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language use
Improve grammar and spelling errors for better clarity.
task response
Expand on your arguments to provide more depth and support for your points.
coherence
Use clearer topic sentences to guide the reader through your points.
task achievement
The essay presents both sides of the argument, which is important for a balanced discussion.
task achievement
Your personal opinion is clearly stated, which is great as it shows your engagement with the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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