You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company. Write a letter to your manager. In your letter: •Say what you have learned in your present job, •Suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department, •Explain why you do not wish to leave the company.

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Dear Mr. Mohamed Touzani , I hope

this

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letter finds you in a radiant spirit ,

Firstly

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,I'm writing to you today to talk about my current job in your company. I'm delighted that I closed two years of my experience in the marketing department . during

this

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period I learned many things and I worked to build different strategies to increase the number of our customers ,

also

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I learned how to work in a big team and how to be a leader of creative projects

Correct your spelling

Furthermore

furthermore

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, I won employee of the month for nine times during

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two years .

Secondly

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, I heard that our marketing manager will leave the company and

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is the

last

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month with us , I believe that I have the skills and the experience required to take

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place .

moreover

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prepared a report of all my achievements during my working period with you and

also

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a list of different goals that I'm planning to work on if I took the chance to take

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role

Finally

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, I hope that you will think of my proposition and

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promise that the company will not regret

such

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a decision

mariamchaoui0Fri Apr 25 2025

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task achievement

Consider adding more details to support your achievements and how they specifically benefit the department you wish to move to.

coherence and cohesion

Improve the flow by using transition words for smoother connections between ideas.

task achievement

Make sure to use a more formal tone consistently, especially in the closing statement of your letter.

task achievement

You provided specific achievements, which adds to your credibility and shows your contributions to the company.

coherence and cohesion

Your polite greeting and attempt to communicate a positive message create a friendly tone in your letter.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

6 paragraphs

200 words

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctic? Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for the locals?

in many countries’ schools have severe problems with student behavior. What do you think are the cause (problems)of this? What solutions can you suggest?

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Nowadays some professionals such as doctor, lawyers and engineers are paid much higher than ordinary workers. What do you think of this trend? Are there any jobs which you think should offer higher salaries?

Too much emphasis is given for education of the young. More government money should be spent to free time activity of young people. To what extent do you agree or disagree?