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Writing Samples
Band 3

The chart details the length of different quality water in rivers in England, water quality of English rivers (in 1000s km) at 1993-2003

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The
line
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 graph illustrates the English
rivers
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river's
rivers'
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quality
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 of water in
km
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,
throughtout
Correct your spelling
throughout
 the period from 1993 to 2003.
Overall
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,
Linking Words
while
Correct word choice
apply
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the three qualities exhibited different trends over the given period. One followed an upward trajectory,
whereas
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 the other two showed a decline.
However
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, the rates of increase and decrease varied significantly between them. As the graph shows, the good
quality
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 rivers were almost 12
km
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 in 1993 at first. Followed by, a sharp growth the year after, reaching just under 20 in 1994.
However
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, the
line
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 generally maintained the same amount of
km
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 with small changes. In 1999, the the
quality
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were
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was
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 22
km
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then
Linking Words
 continued growing till 2001the
line
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 stood tall
with
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at
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 24
km
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 and it had the same amount of
quality
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 the year after, before having a gradual downward trend
inn
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in
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 2003.
By contrast
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, the fair commenced
approximately
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at approximately
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 9.5, the
line
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 rose slowly reaching its peak in 1996 with around 13
km
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quality
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 of water.
Then
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 the
quality
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 dropped slightly till the end of the era, accounting
just
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for just
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 under 10
km
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.
Whereas
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, the
low
Add a hyphen
low-quality
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quality
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 water began with with nearly 9
km
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 in 1993. In 1994 the
quality
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 dramatically declined
with
Change preposition
to
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 less than 5
km
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, After that fell the figure remained under 5 till 2003

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task achievement
The introduction could be clearer. Consider rephrasing to accurately reflect the information being presented, including specific details about the trends in the water quality.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that paragraphs are clearly structured, with smoother transitions between ideas. This will help improve the flow of your essay.
task achievement
Provide more details or examples to support your points. For instance, you might want to specify the changes in water quality for each category more distinctly throughout the timeline.
task achievement
You effectively identified overall trends in the graph, which demonstrates an understanding of the data presented.
coherence and cohesion
Your use of comparative language (e.g., 'by contrast') effectively distinguishes between the different qualities of water, aiding the reader's understanding.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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