IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

The tabe below presents the number of children ever born to women aged 40-44 years in Australia for each year the information was collected since 1981. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisions where relevant.

The table gives information that the Australian
women
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with
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apply
show examples
40-44
years
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 old are the mother of how many
children
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 in four different
years
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 (1981, 1986, 1996 and 2006).
Overall
Linking Words
,
women
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 with three or more
children
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 made up less relevant percentages in recent
years
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 and recorded a considerable decrease rather
than
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to
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previouse
Correct your spelling
previous
years
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.
Conversely
Linking Words
, the proportion of
women
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 with two
children
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 and less increased.
Women
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 with four or more
children
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 recorded the lowest proportion in 2006, accounting for 11%
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is showed around
16.5
Correct article usage
a 16.5
show examples
% decrease,
compare
Change the form of the verb
compared
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 to 1981.
Also
Linking Words
,
women
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 with three
children
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demonestrated
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demonstrated
demonstrate
 the same decreasing trend and made up 21.5% in 2006 with a 6% decrease
compare
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compared
show examples
 to 1981.
In contrast
Linking Words
,
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
 three groups illustrated an increasing trend.
Women
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 with two
children
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 made up around 38% in 2006 with
9
Correct article usage
a 9
show examples
% increase.
In addition
Linking Words
,
women
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 with one child and
women
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 without any
children
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 doubled roughly and accounted for around 13% and 16% in 2006.

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task achievement
Include a brief introduction that paraphrases the task and clearly outlines the main trends in the data.
coherence cohesion
Use linking words and phrases to improve the flow of ideas between sentences and paragraphs.
task achievement
Provide more specific figures and comparisons in terms of percentage changes to support your main points more effectively.
task achievement
The essay contains a clear overall summary of trends observed in the data.
coherence cohesion
The essay makes an attempt to compare different time periods effectively.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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