IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2

In spite of the many advances women have made in education and employment, yjey continue to be at a disadvantage when it comes to pay and promotion. in your view, what shoule be done to promote equality for men and women in the workplace?

There is no doubt that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 these days, the proportion of
energy
Use synonyms
usage
Change the noun form
usages
show examples
such
Linking Words
 as oil and gas is increasing in many modern countries.
Consequently
Linking Words
, several people think it is important to
searching
Change the form of the verb
search
show examples
 for new sources and untouched natural regions. At the same time, it will destroy a lot of places. In
this
Linking Words
 essay, advantages and disadvantages will be discussed. On the one hand, with the expansion of the
energy
Use synonyms
 and industrial sectors specifically in the G20 countries. It became essential to supply the amount of
energy
Use synonyms
 products. Because it is boosting the incomes of these cities.
Also
Linking Words
, gives the opportunity to other nations that have numerous
energy
Use synonyms
resources
Change the noun form
resource
show examples
 areas to exploit their natural spaces.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
The introduction should clearly state your position on the issue and outline the main points that will be discussed in your essay.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that your paragraphs have clear topic sentences and that each idea is logically linked to the next. This will improve the overall flow of your essay.
task achievement
Provide specific examples to support your arguments. This could be data, case studies, or real-life examples that illustrate your points.
task achievement
You have identified both advantages and disadvantages, which demonstrates a balanced view on the topic.
coherence and cohesion
Your use of connecting phrases, such as 'on the one hand', helps in guiding the reader through your arguments.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: