Studying abroad is thought by many students to be the best way to get a good education. On the other hand, some students believe that studying in another country has many drawbacks. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In recent years, international study has gained
an
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unprecedented attention. Some people agree that studying abroad brings great benefits to students,
while
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others argue that it may do more harm than good. In
this
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essay, I will discuss both views before concluding that I am on the prior side. On the one hand, International study fosters independence among students. It is just like a bird out of its nest, exploring the world by itself.
For example
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, the student has to manage their own daily basis compared to when they stay in their home.
Furthermore
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, they
also
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develop self-discipline and making schedule
skill
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as they have no one near them.
This
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means a lot to them to manage to carry on life.
On the other hand
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, the large
expenses
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require
during
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while
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studying
aboard
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abroad
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.
For instance
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, monthly house rent is required pay so that they could have a shelter to stay in.
Besides
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that, meal-out
also
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increases the
expenses
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if they do not possess a kitchen to cook in. Some students will get a part-time job to merely cover their
expenses
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, but
this
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might affect their studies as well.
Therefore
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, huge
expenses
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bring
such
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a burden which leads to them
may be
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taking a loan. In conclusion, studying abroad
allow
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allows
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their self-management greater than others,
whereas
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huge debt after graduation might affect their future as well.
However
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, I believe that studying locally
does
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is
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better than in another country.

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Task Achievement
Your introduction clearly states the topic and your opinion, which is good. However, make sure to use the correct phrase 'the latter' instead of 'the prior side' for clarity. Also, try to rephrase 'international study' to 'studying abroad' for better consistency with your essay content.
Task Achievement
Although your points are relevant, each main point could be developed further with more specific examples and explanations. For instance, elaborating on how self-discipline contributes to students' success would strengthen your argument.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure proper grammatical structures and phrasing. For example, 'the student has to manage their own daily basis' could be improved to 'students have to manage their daily lives independently.'
Coherence and Cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure, but improve transitions between ideas for better flow. Consider linking sentences within paragraphs to show how they relate to each other, which can enhance coherence.
Task Achievement
You have successfully identified both sides of the argument, which is essential for task achievement.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your use of a metaphor (like a bird out of its nest) effectively illustrates the point about independence, which adds to the engagement of your writing.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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