IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

The two floor plans show the renovation of AAA Accountancy's main office. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Contained in the floorplan is information pertaining to the changes which are more likely to occur in an accountancy main
office
Use synonyms
.
Overall
Linking Words
, from an observational perspective, noticeable changes have been made to make the
office
Use synonyms
 become more spacious.
Additionally
Linking Words
, several functional rooms are removed in order to renovate the blueprint. Commencing with the new
customers
Change to a genitive case
customer's
customers'
show examples
office
Use synonyms
 which is located in the north of the main
office
Use synonyms
, will be demolished as in the projection in order to put more desks for clerks.
In contrast
Linking Words
, three rooms located in the east of the main
office
Use synonyms
 will remain in place. Meanwhile, the payroll
office
Use synonyms
 and the storage room will be removed so as to place a sofa on the south of the
office
Use synonyms
 for relaxing. Moving onto the southwestern side of the building , the reception area will be reconstructed with more sofas added.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the accounts
office
Use synonyms
 will be repurposed and turned into a storage room. Just to the right of
this
Linking Words
, the processing
office
Use synonyms
 will be removed in order to place more desks which is similar to the new customer
office
Use synonyms
.
Additionally
Linking Words
, a fax machine and copier will be placed in the centre of the main
office
Use synonyms
.

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task achievement
While you have addressed the main features of the floor plans, ensure that your introduction clearly states what changes are being summarized to enhance clarity. It would help to specify the purpose of the plans in the introduction as well.
coherence and cohesion
Consider improving the logical flow of ideas by using transitional phrases between points. This will enhance the clarity and structure of your essay. For example, use 'Firstly,' 'In contrast,' 'Additionally,' or 'Furthermore' consistently to guide the reader through your comparisons and descriptions.
coherence and cohesion
Try to include a conclusion that succinctly summarizes the main changes made. This can help provide a clear end to your summary and reinforce the main points of your comparison.
task achievement
The essay effectively identifies key changes made to the office layout, which demonstrates an understanding of the subject matter.
coherence and cohesion
You have used a variety of vocabulary related to office layouts, which adds depth to your writing.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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