IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

You paid a refundable deposit when you rented an appartment. You left the department in good condition but the landlord won’t return the deposit. Write a letter to the landlord. In your letter: -Explain why you are writing -Ask for the return of your deposit -Inform the landlord of possible legal action.

Dear Mr Smith, Hope
this
Linking Words
 letter finds you well. I am writing to ask about the pending refundable deposit which I was supposed to get in starting of May. I have been trying to call
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
your cell number but was unable to get through. I am concerned regarding the deposit as I haven't got it yet. I remember in March when I had my
last
Linking Words
 conversation, you mentioned that I
will
Wrong verb form
would
show examples
 send get cheque
with
Change preposition
within
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 three weeks. Since it's been five weeks I still haven't
received
Correct pronoun usage
received it
show examples
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, could you please check why it is delayed
because
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
it was the security deposit and when I was leaving you checked everything and there was no issue with any household items. I had to pay my college fees for next month, I would appreciate
if
Correct pronoun usage
it if
show examples
 I
will
Verb problem
could
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 get it before.
Otherwise
Linking Words
, I would have to take some serious action as in many
lease
Change to a plural noun
leases
show examples
 it was written that I
will
Wrong verb form
would
show examples
 get
full
Add an article
a full
show examples
 refund if there
is
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
not
Correct your spelling
no
show examples
 damage to
property
Correct article usage
the property
show examples
.
Lookinf
Correct your spelling
Looking
 forward to hearing back soon. Yours Sincerely, Sam

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task achievement
Clarify your request for the deposit earlier in the letter to ensure the landlord understands your main concern upfront.
coherence and cohesion
Consider breaking longer sentences into shorter ones for better clarity and coherence.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure all spelling and grammatical errors are corrected; for instance, 'Lookinf' should be 'Looking'.
suitable writing tone
The letter has a polite tone, which is appropriate for the context.
complete response
You successfully communicated your situation and concerns regarding the deposit.
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