IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

You recently purchased a kitchen appliance, but it was delivered late and damaged. Write a letter to the store manager to complain about the issue. In your letter: - describe what item and problems - explain how the late and damaged delivery affected you, - state what you would like the store to do to resolve the problem.

Dear Sir, I am writing
this
Linking Words
 letter to inform you about facing problem with late
delivery
Use synonyms
 and damaged product. As, I did online shopping from
Mintra
Correct article usage
the Mintra
show examples
 site of glass
crocery
Correct your spelling
crockery
grocery
 on 26th
april
Change the capitalization
April
show examples
,
Change preposition
for which
show examples
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
I paid online about $500 because it was very expensive and I
need
Wrong verb form
needed
show examples
 it to give as a present
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 my brother's first anniversary. On your online
site
Add a comma
site,
show examples
 it showed
delivery
Use synonyms
 timing after a week, and my brother's anniversary was
also
Linking Words
at
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the same date of
delivery
Use synonyms
 which I found match timing,
however
Linking Words
, I got
this
Linking Words
 parcel after 2 weeks which gives me
state
Correct article usage
a state
show examples
 of dilemma, that what I could
gave
Change the verb form
give
show examples
 on my brother's anniversary. I really
feel
Wrong verb form
felt
show examples
embarrased
Correct your spelling
embarrassed
 that time but I managed the situation smartly.
However
Linking Words
,
on
Change preposition
at
show examples
 the time of
Use synonyms
delivery
Add a comma
delivery,
show examples
 the
delivery
Use synonyms
 man was in
hurry
Correct article usage
a hurry
show examples
, he
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
tried
Wrong verb form
trying
show examples
 to put
this
Linking Words
 parcel on
table
Add an article
the table
show examples
 but in
rush
Correct article usage
a rush
show examples
 the parcel
falled
Correct your spelling
fell
show examples
 down and the glass
crocery
Correct your spelling
ceiling
breaked
Correct your spelling
broke
. He really felt sorry about it and I understand the situation. Fortunately, I have
suggestion
Add an article
a suggestion
show examples
 if you might send me
an
Remove the article
apply
show examples
another
same
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
product with some discount that would be the
last
Linking Words
 option for me because I already paid
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
Linking Words
this
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
about $500 which
then
Linking Words
 going to be a big
loos
Correct your spelling
loss
show examples
 if I do not get the purchase. Thanks for
the
Change the word
your
show examples
 understanding, I'm looking forward
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
you
Change the pronoun
your
show examples
 kind reply. Yours sincerely, Prabhnoor Kaur

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coherence and cohesion
Consider organizing your letter into clear paragraphs that each address a single topic. This will improve the flow of your writing.
task achievement
Make sure to clearly state your expectation for a resolution, such as a replacement or refund, to reinforce your complaint's effectiveness.
task achievement
Your opening clearly states the purpose of the letter, showing your intention to address a problem.
task achievement
You included specific details about the purchase and the issues faced, which helps to illustrate your complaint effectively.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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