IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

In many countries, the number of people suffering from stress in the workplace is increasing. What do you think are the causes of this problem and what measures could be taken to tackle it?

In
today
Change noun form
today's
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 world
the
Correct article usage
apply
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mental
disease
Fix the agreement mistake
diseases
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 widely spread especially in the
Correct your spelling
workplace
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work place
Correct your spelling
workplace
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 in a lot of countries it might be the most
problems
Correct word choice
common problems
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In
Change preposition
On
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 the first hand the primary several
of
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apply
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causes of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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mental problems
for example
Linking Words
 uncomfortable feelings in the company or organization office
whatever it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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and they have weak communication
other
Correct word choice
and other
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 important points that work long hours daily that can impact their productivity and impact their health.
Therefore
Linking Words
 the most significant effect
of
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apply
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the managers
in addition
Linking Words
the
Change preposition
to the
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 environment workplace has
effecte
Correct your spelling
effect
effective
affected
 with the
employees
Use synonyms
 so that what they think that On
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
 hand the
employees
Use synonyms
 stress they should build confidence
however
Linking Words
 the
manager
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manager's
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 office has leadership to leed the
employees
Use synonyms
 comfortable
while
Linking Words
 working for long
houser
Correct your spelling
hours
show examples
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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productivity decrease and the
Use synonyms
employees
Change noun form
employee's
employees'
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 mental health go down . To illustrate how we can improve productivity for
employees
Use synonyms
 instance
give
Wrong verb form
giving
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bounc
Correct your spelling
bounce
,
high
Correct article usage
a high
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 salary increase
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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will make
the
Correct article usage
apply
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stress decrease
this
Linking Words
 proves clearly that
make
Verb problem
apply
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challenges in workplaces In
conclusion
Add a comma
conclusion,
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 we should protect the workers people and respect what they did.
Linking Words
Moreover
Add a comma
Moreover,
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 we need
care
Fix the infinitive
to care
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 about
there
Correct your spelling
their
show examples
 mental health and
pushing
Wrong verb form
push
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 the workers up

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Task Response
The introduction should clearly outline the issue and provide a preview of the causes and measures to be discussed. Try revising it to ensure clarity and focus.
Coherence and Cohesion
Use more linking words and phrases to improve the flow of your writing. This will help the reader understand how your ideas connect.
Task Achievement
You have identified some key causes of workplace stress, which is a good start in addressing the task.
Task Achievement
The ideas presented demonstrate an awareness of the importance of mental health in the workplace, reflecting concern for employee well-being.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • workplace stress
  • work-life balance
  • job insecurity
  • economic downturn
  • management support
  • unrealistic deadlines
  • adapt to new technologies
  • mental fatigue
  • physical fatigue
  • employee well-being
What to do next:
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