IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Nowadays, many people choose to be self-employed rather than to work for a company or organization. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?

Employees are increasingly preferring to be self-employed rather than working for any kind of business or
company
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. In terms of flexibility and control over time management for better schedules. In
this
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 essay, the advantages and disadvantages of
this
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 topic over working for a
company
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 will be discussed. On the one hand, there are various advantages
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 self-employment, including flexibility in the schedules gives workers the possibility of
practicing
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practising
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 another activity or even a chance to plan any kind of social activity more easily.
While
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 working on the needed and immediate tasks, a person can do the work that needs to be done
first,
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and
then
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 allocate time to different activities.
For instance
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, trying to
make
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do
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 a physical activity like tennis
while
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 working, a person can manage the time
according to
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 the workload.
On the other hand
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, there are some drawbacks,
such
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 as economic conditions. As a boss of your own
company
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 may provide unwanted consequences because of the lack of good financial management.
While
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 trying to develop and finish the jobs that have been given personally, it could be hard to control the other priorities,
such
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 as economic conditions.
This
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 situation makes self-employment harder and amends the
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company
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company's
show examples
 development negatively. In conclusion, being self-employed requires a lot of effort and hard work. In some cases, individuals prefer to be in their comfort zone
instead
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 of a busy and stressful business.
However
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, the final decision depends on whether a person has more benefits or not.
Finally
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, in my personal opinion, I believe that getting my own business is much better than working for somebody else, under their rules and schedules.

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Task Achievement
Try to provide more examples and details to support your points. This will help strengthen your arguments and make your essay more convincing.
Coherence and Cohesion
Make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea and that all sentences support that idea. This will improve the flow of your essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
Use linking words to connect your ideas and paragraphs better. Words like 'firstly', 'however', and 'in conclusion' can help guide the reader.
Coherence and Cohesion
You have a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. This is good for organized writing.
Task Achievement
You address both advantages and disadvantages of self-employment, which is important for a balanced discussion.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • self-employed
  • company
  • organization
  • freedom
  • independence
  • income potential
  • flexibility
  • working hours
  • working location
  • passions
  • interests
  • decision-making
  • business practices
  • disadvantages
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