IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people believe that the typical teaching situation of a teacher and students in the class will not exist by the year 2050. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The rapid advancement of educational technology has sparked debate about the future of traditional
classroom
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 learning.
While
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 digital innovations are undoubtedly transforming how we acquire knowledge,
i
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I
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 firmly believe that the complete elimination of conventional teacher-student
classroom
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 interactions by 2050 is highly improbable, as
human
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the human
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 connection remains fundamental to effective
education
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. Of course, it seems inevitable that virtual learning replaces part of conventional
classroom
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 settings, notably with the development of artificial intelligence
This
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consequently
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 leads to a digital transformation of
education
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 with virtual learning platforms.
This
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 trend can already be observed in brick-and-mortar institutions where teachers
learn
Verb problem
teach
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 children to use ChatGPT as a research tool to draw
on
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apply
show examples
.
For example
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, my 7-year-old soon learnt in
Use synonyms
classroom
Add an article
the classroom
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 how to repair a balloon with AI.
Likewise
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, children in China
trained
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are trained
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 from age 5 to use it with the teacher. Extending
this
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 line of reasoning, we can imagine that, in the future, there will
have
Verb problem
be
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 personalized learning thanks to
algorithms
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algorithm
show examples
 technologies.
This
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 approach could provide a
customize
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customised
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 teaching with remote learning infrastructure and
then
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fostering
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foster
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 academic success.
However
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, despite these advancements and their advantages, human connections remain fundamental to effective
education
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. Indeed,
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face to
Add a hyphen
face-to-face
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face
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 instruction seems necessary to develop communication skills and
then
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 the ability to express yourself in public with others
humans’
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humans
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 people.
This
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is means
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means
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 that technologies could never substitute verbal exchanges which learn to understand non-verbal and emotional language which the AI lacks. A good illustration of
this
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 is the case of a man who committed
a
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apply
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suicide because the AI with which he used to discuss told him that the
researches
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research
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 of his life on climate
changing
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change
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were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
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 useless.
Furthermore
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, in
person
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personal
show examples
 learning environment provides exchanging and debating ideas.
For instance
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, in Canada, journalism students have to learn their
theorical
Correct your spelling
theoretical
 lessons at home and they come to physical
classroom
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 interactions to discuss topics with their peers.
To conclude
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, if the digital transformation of
education
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 is unavoidable, the prediction of the end of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
traditional
education
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 by the year 2050 seems somewhat exaggerated. In my opinion, new technologies could never replace
Use synonyms
face to
Add a hyphen
face-to-face
show examples
face
Use synonyms
 instruction in learning human skills. Ultimately,
human’s
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human
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 people must not become
as
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apply
show examples
machines but only rely on them.

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task achievement
Your introduction clearly states your opinion on the topic, which is good. Try to make your thesis statement more specific to improve clarity.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph clearly connects to the main topic and flows logically. Use clear topic sentences to introduce each paragraph.
task achievement
Use more specific examples to support your points. For instance, provide specific details on how technology affects learning.
task achievement
You clearly express your opinion and provide arguments for it.
task achievement
You effectively discuss the role of technology in education.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a logical progression of ideas.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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