You recently received a letter from a friend asking for your advice on whether to go to college or to try to get a job. You think he/ she should get a job. Write a letter to this friend. In your letter: say why she will not enjoy going to college explain why getting a job is a good idea Suggest the type of job that would be suitable.

Dear Fatima, How are you?It is so nice to hear from you that you have completed a one-year diploma in Computer program of

studies

Use synonyms

and you were looking for advice on whether to continue studying or to get a

job

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. I would suggest you apply for a

job

Use synonyms

related to your field.

According to

Linking Words

my opinion, you will find college boring and

waste

Correct article usage

a waste

show examples

of time.

Moreover

Linking Words

, you will

also

Linking Words

have to face the pressure of managing fees for your

studies

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. You had already spent thousands on your previous study and now

its

Correct your spelling

it's

show examples

time to recover those back. Most importantly, all of your friends are now applying for jobs and they will not continue their

studies

Use synonyms

. So, you will find yourself alone in a new semester because it is not very easy to make friends with strangers in just two or three days. It will take

long

Change the article

a long

show examples

time to build

trustworthy

Add an article

a trustworthy

the trustworthy

show examples

relationship and in that meantime, you will fed up with college. I would say getting work is a very good idea as in

this

Linking Words

way you will get both money

as well as

Linking Words

experience. You will be no longer stressed about your fees.

Additionally

Linking Words

, you will gain wide experience in working with various people.

Moreover

Linking Words

, it will

also

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improve your communication skills. It is not difficult for you to get a field

job

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as you are extremely talented, goal-oriented

as well as

Linking Words

organized. Most importantly, you have always dreamed of getting a

job

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in the field of Computer

Studies

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. I think you should apply for the

job

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of a Drafter or a Designer as these jobs are in demand nowadays. Many companies are hiring people for these positions and they are providing reasonable wages. You can apply easily for

this

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role by visiting their official website and they will let you know in two to three days about

further

Linking Words

hiring process. I hope you will look forward towards

this

Linking Words

. Good Luck! Best Regards, Dilpreet

dk9668469Thu May 29 2025

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coherence and cohesion

Make sure to include a clearer introduction and conclusion to give a stronger structure.

coherence and cohesion

Try to use simpler sentences to express your ideas more clearly.

coherence and cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph focuses on one main idea for better understanding.

task achievement

You gave good reasons for why your friend should get a job.

task achievement

The letter has a friendly tone, which is nice for a letter to a friend.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

8 paragraphs

324 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

academic pressures
financial burdens
tuition
student loans
uncertainty
work experience
earn money
practical skills
professional network
align with interests
growth opportunities
on-the-job training
apprenticeships

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