IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

Some people say that the Internet will soon become the preferred method of delivery of the news and information, causing the newspapers and magazines to gradually disappear. Do you agree or disagree? Give your opinion and include examples from your knowledge or experience. I'm

In the prevailing era, the
internet
Use synonyms
 has
beome
Correct your spelling
become
 a part of
people
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's lives. Some
people
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 think that
people
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 will prioritize the
internet
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 to read
news
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instead
Linking Words
 of reading
newspapers
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 and magazines. I totally agree with
this
Linking Words
 notion. Commencing with the most salient reason why the popularity of reading
newspapers
Use synonyms
 and magazines will
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
decresaed
Correct your spelling
decrease
 in the future among individuals
due to
Linking Words
 the availability of
network
Fix the agreement mistake
networks
show examples
 is that the
internet
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 is fast and easy to access. Many
people
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 can use their mobile phones, laptops, and tablets to read
latest
Change the article
the latest
show examples
news
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 anytime and anywhere.
For example
Linking Words
, thanks to the 5G network, most of them read
news
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 in
an isolated areas
Correct the article-noun agreement
isolated areas
an isolated area
show examples
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the
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internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
 is
cost effective
Add a hyphen
cost-effective
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 as compared to traditional
newspapers
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 and magazines.
People
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 have to buy
newspapers
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for reading
Change preposition
to read
show examples
latest
Correct article usage
the latest
show examples
news
Use synonyms
Linking Words
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
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 is generally expensive
as
Correct word choice
apply
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compared to
the
Correct article usage
an
show examples
internet
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 connection.
To conclude
Linking Words
, I believe that
people
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 will give preference to the
internet
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 for reading
news
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 because it is the fastest mode and it is not expensive as compared to
newspapers
Use synonyms

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coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion. However, you could make the main points clearer by expanding on them a bit more. Try to give more details or examples for each point.
task achievement
You should also try to avoid spelling errors, such as 'become' instead of 'become' and 'decreased' instead of 'decreases.' These small mistakes can affect the score.
coherence and cohesion
Consider making your sentences more varied and complex. Using different sentence structures can improve the flow of your writing.
task achievement
You clearly express your opinion and have a clear structure in your essay.
task achievement
You provide some good examples to support your points, like mentioning the 5G network.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Internet
  • news
  • information
  • newspapers
  • magazines
  • delivery
  • popular
  • people
  • access
  • update
  • example
  • events
  • social media
  • share
  • spread
  • quickly
  • traditional
  • online
  • adapt
  • digital
  • age
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