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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The bar chart below shows estimated world illiteracy rates by region and by gender for the last year. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart below shows estimated world illiteracy rates by region and by gender for the last year. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The given chart illustrates the
Use synonyms
percent
Replace the word
percentage
show examples
 of both
gender
Change to a plural noun
genders
show examples
 in estimating world rates of illiteracy in previous years.
Overall
Linking Words
, in all of
Add an article
the region
show examples
region
Fix the agreement mistake
regions
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,
female
Correct article usage
the female
show examples
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 always
higer
Correct your spelling
higher
 than
male
Fix the agreement mistake
males
show examples
.
Addtionally
Correct your spelling
Additionally
,
South
Change preposition
in South
show examples
 Asia, the
Use synonyms
percent
Replace the word
percentage
show examples
 of both
gender
Fix the agreement mistake
genders
show examples
 in illiteracy was the highest. Regarding 3 regions where they made up a majority of estimating illiteracy.
In
Change preposition
Of
show examples
 all of them,
female
Fix the agreement mistake
females
show examples
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
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made up approximately 50%
which
Correct word choice
and
show examples
 South Asian
female
Fix the agreement mistake
females
show examples
 stand out at over 55%.
Likewise
Linking Words
, the
Use synonyms
percent
Replace the word
percentage
show examples
 of males in all 3 regions was roughly 30% ,
which
Correct your spelling
with
show examples
male
Fix the agreement mistake
males
show examples
 in South Asian against the highest of all. Taking
alook
Correct your spelling
a look
to
Change preposition
at
show examples
 the remaining regions where their proportion
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
 minor.
As
Change preposition
In
show examples
 both developed countries and Caribbean people, even female's
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
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 was higher than
male
Fix the agreement mistake
males
show examples
, it
seem
Change the verb form
seems
show examples
 a small disparity, just more than around 2%. The opposite trend can be seen in Oceania where the
Use synonyms
percent
Replace the word
percentage
show examples
 of females accounted for 20% and double the male's proportion.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words percent with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Illiteracy rates
  • Region
  • Gender disparity
  • Bar chart
  • Estimated
  • Summarise
  • Main features
  • Comparisons
  • Analyzing
  • Discrepancies
  • Significant
  • Pronounced
  • Speculation
  • Male
  • Female
  • Global perspective
  • Literacy
  • Educational attainment
  • Socio-economic factors
  • Cultural influences
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