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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The two pie charts below show some employment patterns in Great Britain in 1992. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The two pie charts below show some employment patterns in Great Britain in 1992. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
the pie graphs illustrate male and
femamle
Correct your spelling
female
 employment in
tow
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two
show examples
diffirenet
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different
 jobs,manual and non-manual in Great Britain in
90's
Correct article usage
the 90's
show examples
.
overall
Linking Words
, the chart shows that the managerial and professional accounted for the highest
propotion
Correct your spelling
proportion
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
male
Fix the agreement mistake
males
show examples
, and clerical and related jobs represent
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 significant ratio
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
female
Fix the agreement mistake
females
show examples
,
while
Linking Words
 the lowest
persentage
Correct your spelling
percentage
 for both gender in
general
Correct article usage
the general
show examples
 labourers
feild
Correct your spelling
field
. In
term
Fix the agreement mistake
terms
show examples
 of male professions,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
managerial and other professional careers make up the highest
persentag
Correct your spelling
percentage
 at 36% .
Similarly
Linking Words
 , craft or similar work and other manual jobs have the same
ration
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ratio
show examples
 nearly at 24% and 26% ,
respectiviely
Correct your spelling
respectively
.
Correct your spelling
while
while
Linking Words
 clerical or related and other
non manual
Add a hyphen
non-manual
show examples
 careers have the same portion at 6% .
wherese
Correct your spelling
where
whereas
 the lowest percentage was for general
laboures
Correct your spelling
labourers
.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
▼
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • employment patterns
  • unemployment
  • sector
  • distribution
  • comparison
  • percentage
  • manufacturing
  • services
  • full-time
  • part-time
  • Great Britain
  • demographics
  • workforce
  • labor market
  • 1992
  • data representation
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