IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

the digram show th stages of making cement and concrete

The illustration
demonstrate
Change the verb form
demonstrates
show examples
 the stages and tools
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
used in the process of making
cement
Use synonyms
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and the usage of
cement
Use synonyms
 in concrete-making that
used
Add a missing verb
is used
show examples
 for
bulidings
Correct your spelling
buildings
.
Overall
Linking Words
, there is a 5 stage, man-made, liner process in
cement
Use synonyms
 production
started
Wrong verb form
starting
show examples
 with raw materials into
crucher
Correct your spelling
crusher
 and ending with bagging
cement
Use synonyms
.
The concrete
Correct article usage
Concrete
show examples
 production
contains
Verb problem
consists
show examples
 of two stages
started
Wrong verb form
starting
show examples
 with adding raw materials and mixing them together. First of all, to produce
cement
Use synonyms
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
limestone and clay are added into a crusher to
turns
Wrong verb form
turn
show examples
 it into powder. After that the powder is added into a small mixer
then
Linking Words
 it goes through a pipe to a
rotaing
Correct your spelling
rotating
 heater.
FIinally
Correct your spelling
Finally
 the powder is placed in
grinder
Add an article
a grinder
the grinder
show examples
 to collect
cement
Use synonyms
 before being packed into bags.
The concrete
Correct article usage
Concrete
show examples
 production begins with adding some raw elements that
being
Add a missing verb
are being
show examples
 measured
such
Linking Words
 as
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
15% of
cement
Use synonyms
, 10% water, 25% sand and half gravel into a concrete mixer. Following that, all these
elemnts
Correct your spelling
elements
 are mixed together to produce concrete that
used
Add a missing verb
is used
show examples
 for
bulidings
Correct your spelling
building
buildings
 purposes.

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coherence and cohesion
Try to follow a clearer structure in the essay. Use paragraphs effectively to separate different stages of the process.
task achievement
Add a conclusion that summarizes the main points. This helps to round off the essay.
coherence and cohesion
Use simpler sentences and check for spelling mistakes, for example, "rotaing" should be "rotating".
task achievement
You clearly outlined the steps of making cement and concrete, which shows you understand the process well.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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