IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The chart below g/vas information about how families in one country spent their weekly income in 1968 and in 2018. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below g/vas information about how families in one country spent their weekly income in 1968 and in 2018. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The chart displays
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
data about how families
in
Linking Words
particular
Correct article usage
a particular
show examples
 country allocate their weekly earnings over a 50-year period, from 1968 to 2018.
Overall
Linking Words
, the majority of households’ money
spent
Add a missing verb
was spent
show examples
 on food
whereas
Linking Words
 fuel and power took at least amount in 1968.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
leisure
Correct article usage
the leisure
show examples
 category involved the maximum percentage of income
while
Linking Words
 personal goods and fuel and power
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 the minimum
spendings
Fix the agreement mistake
spending
show examples
 for families in 2018. All
rate
Fix the agreement mistake
rates
show examples
 of categories except household goods changed during a period. With
detailed
Correct article usage
a detailed
show examples
 analysis of the chart,
spendingson
Correct your spelling
spending on
 food section dramatically fell down from 35% to under 20% over a 50-year.
In contrast
Linking Words
,
amount
Correct article usage
the amount
show examples
 of money on leisure significantly increased from under 10 %to over 20 %.
Additionally
Linking Words
, the amount of housing and transport money
were
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
also
Linking Words
 rose compared to previous years,
their
Change preposition
with their
show examples
 percentages almost
closed
Replace the word
close
show examples
 to 20% and 15%, respectively.
Moreover
Linking Words
, clothing and footwear expenditures plummeted double times( from 10% to 5%)
while
Linking Words
personal
Correct article usage
the personal
show examples
goods’
Change noun form
goods
show examples
 rate approximately
increased
Verb problem
apply
show examples
the same times from 1968 to 2018.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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