IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed rather than to work for a company or organization. What might be the cases? What could be the disadvantage of being self-employed?

In recent years, individuals are more likely to prefer self-employment rather than working for a business. There are several reasons for
this
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 phenomenon in terms of convenience and personal preferences.
However
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, from a wider perspective,
this
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 trend generates not only benefits but
also
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the
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apply
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drawbacks.
Hence
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, in
this
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 essay, I will provide the reasons behind
this
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 and discuss the disadvantages before presenting my opinion.
Initially
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, there are several reasons why
people
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 tend to become self-employed, which
people
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 can find it more easy to manage. Especially, in today's fast-paced business places, work can be stressful to
people
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 who have
also
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 been struggling with their life
conditions
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,
such
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 as family responsibilities.
For instance
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, my father, who has worked in Real estate businesses for so many years, nowadays cannot take all the responsibility
of
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for
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 our family with the stressful work
conditions
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.
Thus
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, he opened a new private
company
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 and can now manage both sides without complaining about
the
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his
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 anxiety
conditions
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. Another considerable reason is the economic
conditions
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. When a person works under someone else, unfortunately, the salary is generally lower than
the
Correct your spelling
they
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 deserved.
For instance
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, a person who works for hours to get minimum wage in Turkey started to feel used and started to open a
company
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 to get the deserved salary.
Therefore
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, the number of companies started to increase because of the aim to become independent of a
company
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.
However
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, several disadvantages cannot be ignored. The major one is that the instability of income might affect the
company
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's bank accounts. Some days, they may not be revenues from the
company
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, which may even lead to downturns in the long term in terms of economic financing. To illustrate
this
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, there are several private companies in Turkey that have started to lose
due to
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 the competitive and uncontrolled financial changes globally.
In addition
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 to
this
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,
this
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 financial instability can lead to stress, anxiety, and, in severe cases, mental health issues. Bearing in mind of aforementioned points, in conclusion, there are noticeable factors why
people
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 started to become self-employed employed than working in a
company
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 in terms of convenience and economic freedom.
However
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,
on the other hand
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, there are some drawbacks because the preference for self-employment leads to financial instability
due to
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 the competitive market sector.
Therefore
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, I believe that,
while
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 self-employment may be ideal for some, it is not without its challenges and must be approached with careful planning.

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea and that the ideas flow logically from one to the next.
task achievement
Try to provide more specific examples to support your points. This strengthens your argument.
coherence and cohesion
Check for grammar and punctuation errors to make your writing clearer and easier to read.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
task achievement
You address both the reasons for self-employment and its disadvantages, which shows a balanced view.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • autonomy
  • align
  • flexibility
  • work-life balance
  • productivity
  • advancements in technology
  • entrepreneurial spirit
  • financial rewards
  • constraints
  • employee benefits
  • administrative tasks
  • financial instability
  • job insecurity
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