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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

These pie charts show the main reasons for studying English amongst the four most prevalent nationalities at a language school in the UK in 2017. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where necessary.

These pie charts show the main reasons for studying English amongst the four most prevalent nationalities at a language school in the UK in 2017. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where necessary.
These
datas
Correct your spelling
data
 indicate the prevalent causes with
proportion
Add an article
the proportion
a proportion
show examples
 of 4 categories at a
languate
Correct your spelling
language
 school in the UK in 2017. The majority
both
Change preposition
of both
show examples
 1987 and 2007
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 suitable degree courses and it gets a different type of
changing
Change the form of the verb
change
show examples
. First of all, the largest percentage of these charts is suitable degree courses. It
has
Wrong verb form
had
show examples
 a proportion
with
Change preposition
of
show examples
 35% in 1987, and it increased by 2%
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
 37% in 2007. The second largest part is different between 1987 and 2007. In the case of 1987,
second
Add an article
the second
show examples
 is
quality
Use synonyms
 of resources with 21%, but it changed into close to parental home with 22% in 2007. The next biggest feature is that there are 2 types of changing
diretion
Correct your spelling
direction
. In the beginning, two groups including good sports and social activities and the
quality
Use synonyms
 of resources have a tendency to decrease the proportion. Good sports and social activities decreased
with
Change preposition
from
show examples
 19% to 6%.
Also
Linking Words
, the
quality
Use synonyms
 of resources decreased
with
Change preposition
from
show examples
 21% to 17%.
In contrast
Linking Words
,
three
Correct article usage
the three
show examples
 groups increased the range
of
Change preposition
between
show examples
 1987 and 2007.
While
Linking Words
 the suitable degree courses and the
quality
Use synonyms
 of teaching increased slightly
with
Change preposition
by
show examples
 2 or 3%, the
close to parental
Add a hyphen
close-to-parental
show examples
 home soared
with
Change preposition
by
show examples
 10% to 22%.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words quality with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decrease" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 3 times.
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