You will move to a new city for work. You know some people who live there. Write a letter to your manager. In your letter: - Ask them for help finding accommodation - Tell them where you would like to live - Tell them the type of place you are looking for

Dear Mr. Smith, I hope
your
Change the pronoun
you
show examples
are doing well. I am writing
this
Linking Words
letter to let you know that I will be moving
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
Toronto soon which is very new to me.
Moreover
Linking Words
, I need your help to
finding
Change the verb form
find
show examples
an
Remove the article
apply
show examples
accommodation over there. I know
few
Correct article usage
a few
show examples
people who
live
Wrong verb form
have lived
show examples
there
since
Change preposition
for
show examples
5 years they know the place very well.
However
Linking Words
, I am looking for a place which is nearby the
offcie
Correct your spelling
office
bulding
Correct your spelling
building
and will be
convinent
Correct your spelling
convenient
for me to reach the office.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, I was looking
some
Change preposition
at some
show examples
appartments
Correct your spelling
apartments
on the website which
seems
Correct subject-verb agreement
seem
show examples
to
me
Correct your spelling
be
show examples
very
leigit
Correct your spelling
light
and have
an
Remove the article
apply
show examples
enough space for me. They
dont
Correct your spelling
don't
have
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
laundry in the unit but it
in
Add a missing verb
is in
show examples
the building which is in the basement and I
dont
Correct your spelling
don't
have any issue with it.
However
Linking Words
, my concern is I need a place which has at least Three rooms so I can share with some other individuals by
this
Linking Words
I am able to save some money for my
family
Change noun form
family's
show examples
help. Thank You, Yours Faithfully, Syed Khawar Ali

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Make sure you ask your manager for help in a clear way.
coherence
Try to organize your ideas better. Each paragraph should have one main idea.
coherence
Check your spelling and grammar, such as 'appartments' should be 'apartments' and 'convient' should be 'convenient'.
task achievement
You have a clear purpose for your letter, which is to ask for help.
task achievement
Your letter includes details about what you are looking for in accommodation, which is good.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: