These days many people leave their country to work abroad and take their family with them. Do you think benefits of this outweigh disadvantages in terms of family development?

There is no denying the fact that people leave their own

country

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with their

families

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to work abroad.

While

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it is a commonly held belief that it will affect

families

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' development, there is

also

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an argument that opposes

this

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idea.

This

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essay will analyse

this

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topic from both points of view and express my opinion. On the one hand, a family can gain more income by finding a job in another

country

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In other words

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, some countries have low salaries compared to others.

In addition

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, there are a lot of

families

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who want to be in the same place and not be separated.

For example

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, a lot of people from India try to work abroad first by themselves to find a house

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and a job ,

then

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bring their family with them so they can live a better life.

Such

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as, it can lead to a family bonding more by being in a different

country

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On the other hand

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, it can lead to many hidden problems for the parents and children. It is possible to say that it will be hard to adapt to another

country

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and the language they speak.

Moreover

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, many

families

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can lose their bonds by fighting

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and not talking to each other.

Furthermore

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, Parents might

also

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face stress with their jobs and adjusting to a new culture.

This

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stress can impact family happiness and development.

For instance

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, my best friend moved to the UK with her family , which led to many problems because

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the kids wanted to go back home , which was not healthy for the family. In conclusion, the benefits outweigh the disadvantages in the ways that have been discussed in the essay. A person will benefit from it for their family and a better income to live a better lifestyle.

However

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, it depends on the person on how they see it.

drrima990

Jul 14, 2025

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task achievement

Make sure to clearly explain both sides of the argument. Provide more examples and details to support your ideas.

coherence and cohesion

Use clear linking words to help the flow of your essay. This will make it easier for the reader to follow your points.

task achievement

Your introduction sets the stage for the discussion well. It clearly states that you will discuss both sides.

task achievement

You presented some good ideas about family bonding and stress, showing different sides of the topic.

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13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

309 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

benefit
disadvantage
family
development
abroad
culture
quality of life
job
salary
support
money
learn
challenge
bond
environment
language
friends
emotional
stress
happiness
adaptability

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