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Writing Samples
Band 4

The diagram below illustrates how a simple water filter is constructed and how it functions to produce clean drinking water. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown below. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant

The diagram below illustrates how a simple water filter is constructed and how it functions to produce clean drinking water. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown below. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant
The picture shows how a simple
water
Use synonyms
filter
Use synonyms
 is built and how it functions to produce clean drinking
water
Use synonyms
. The simple
water
Use synonyms
filter
Use synonyms
 has 2 stages and 5 steps
so
Punctuation problem
, so
show examples
 that it can vary from impure
water
Use synonyms
 to clean
water
Use synonyms
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 can be used.
Firstly
Linking Words
, impure
water
Use synonyms
 is
spilled
Verb problem
spilt
show examples
to
Change preposition
into
show examples
 a big tank which has a
filter
Use synonyms
 with three layers. On
the
Correct article usage
apply
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top is sand, the middle layer is charcoal
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 the bottom is gravel. A
water
Use synonyms
 pipe is directly connected to a drinking
water
Use synonyms
 storage tank
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 can contain clean
water
Use synonyms
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
tap
Correct article usage
the tap
show examples
is drained
Wrong verb form
drains
show examples
water
Use synonyms
 to use. In a simple
water
Use synonyms
filter
Use synonyms
, with input impure
water
Use synonyms
 is poured into the main container before it flows through the
filter
Use synonyms
 core
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 has three layers. On
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
top is sand
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 removes larger particles,
nest
Use the right word
next
show examples
 is the middle layer is charcoal
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 absorbs impurities and
odors
Use the right word
odours
show examples
, and the bottom is gravel
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 supports other layers and filters coarse
.
Check wording
particles.
show examples
 After filtration,
water
Use synonyms
 exits through a pipe which is directly connected
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
 a drinking
water
Use synonyms
 storage tank
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 contains clean
water
Use synonyms
.
At the end
Linking Words
 of
stages
Correct article usage
the stages
show examples
, people can use clean
water
Use synonyms
 by turning on the tap.

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words water, filter with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 1 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • diagram
  • illustrates
  • simple water filter
  • constructed
  • functions
  • produce
  • clean drinking water
  • main features
  • comparisons
  • relevant
  • introduction
  • explanation
  • construction
  • description
  • filtered water
  • original water source
  • conclusion
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