IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The charts below show the percentage of workers in three different sectors in four countries in 1980 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The charts below show the percentage of workers in three different sectors in four countries in 1980 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The charts below
provides
Correct subject-verb agreement
provide
show examples
 an overview of workers in
three
Use synonyms
 different sectors in four
countries
Use synonyms
: Germany, the USA, Japan,
Use synonyms
China
Correct word choice
and China
show examples
in
Punctuation problem
, in
show examples
 1980 and 2010.
Overall
Linking Words
, the
industry
Use synonyms
 in
three
Use synonyms
countries
Use synonyms
always
Verb problem
is always
show examples
 higher than
agriculture
Use synonyms
 and
services
Use synonyms
but
Punctuation problem
, but
show examples
 in
Use synonyms
china
Fix capitalization
China
show examples
,
agriculture
Use synonyms
 accounts for the highest rate of workers between 1980 and 2010. In 1980, the
industry
Use synonyms
 was
development
Replace the word
developing
show examples
 strongly and it always
over
Verb problem
had over
show examples
 50
person
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
 in
three
Use synonyms
countries
Use synonyms
. With the
services
Use synonyms
 which
also
Linking Words
take
Verb problem
have
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 high rate
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
this
Linking Words
 time, in
Fix capitalization
America
show examples
america
Punctuation problem
america,
show examples
 it
almost
Verb problem
is almost
show examples
 equal to
Use synonyms
industry
Correct article usage
the industry
show examples
.
Although
Linking Words
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 it has the lowest in
Use synonyms
three the
Correct word order
the three
show examples
countries
Use synonyms
,
agriculture
Use synonyms
 has the highest percentage in
China
Use synonyms
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 both in
agriculture
Use synonyms
 and
Use synonyms
services
Punctuation problem
services,
show examples
 there is high too.
On
Change preposition
In
show examples
 the contract, Germany is
shortest in the
Correct word order
the shortest in
show examples
agriculture
Use synonyms
. In 2010, the
industry
Use synonyms
 was strongly
growth
Replace the word
growing
show examples
but
Punctuation problem
, but
show examples
 in
Use synonyms
china
Fix capitalization
China
show examples
 started a
fall significant
Correct word order
significant fall started
show examples
. Like in 1980,
germany
Fix capitalization
Germany
show examples
 is
shortest
Correct article usage
the shortest
show examples
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
Use synonyms
three
Correct article usage
the three
show examples
countries
Use synonyms
. The
services
Use synonyms
Verb problem
are always
show examples
always
Correct word order
also always
show examples
also
Linking Words
 take
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 high rate in time.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 80%.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words three, countries, china, industry, agriculture, services with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • percentage
  • sector
  • distribution
  • dominance
  • decline
  • significant changes
  • employment
  • patterns
  • trends
  • global
  • compare
  • highlight
  • examine
  • identify
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