In the digital age, video games, and TV consumption has increased. The same can have deleterious effects on a child's mental health. To what extent would you support this idea?

Nowadays , following the rapid advancement of technologies , there is

the

Correct article usage

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rocketing rate of

entertainment

Use synonyms

media consumption, which has been raising concerns among parents about its potentially detrimental effects on their

children

Use synonyms

's well-being. My opinion towards

this

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notion is neutral , and the reason why shall be explained in

this

Linking Words

essay. On one hand, it is undeniable that excessive exposure to video

games

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and television can negatively impact a child’s mental health. Prolonged screen time may lead to reduced physical activity, resulting in health complications

such

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as obesity and fatigue, which can indirectly affect psychological well-being.

Additionally

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, some

children

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may become socially withdrawn, prioritising virtual interactions over real-life relationships. In extreme cases, exposure to violent or inappropriate content may desensitise

children

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or lead to behavioural issues

such

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as aggression or anxiety.

On the other hand

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, there are positive aspects to the consumption of digital

entertainment

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. Many educational programs and

games

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are designed to stimulate learning, enhance cognitive skills, and foster creativity.

For instance

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, strategy-based video

games

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can improve problem-solving abilities,

while

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TV programs tailored for young audiences can teach moral values, language skills, and general knowledge.

Moreover

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, digital

entertainment

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can serve as a form of relaxation or stress relief after a demanding day at school, contributing positively to mental well-being when consumed in moderation. In conclusion,

while

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concerns regarding the potential harm of video

games

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and TV consumption are valid, these forms of

entertainment

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also

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offer certain benefits when approached responsibly.

Therefore

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, I hold a neutral position, believing that the effects largely depend on the content, duration, and context in which these media are consumed. A balanced and supervised approach is essential to ensure that

children

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gain the advantages

while

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minimizing

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minimising

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the risks.

caivankihh779

Jul 19, 2025

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task achievement

Your introduction sets the stage well, but try to clearly state your position. A stronger thesis statement can help clarify your view.

coherence cohesion

Your paragraphs are mostly clear, but some ideas can be more connected. Use transition words to help the reader follow your thoughts.

task achievement

Include more specific examples or evidence to support your points. This can strengthen your argument and make it more convincing.

task achievement

You addressed both sides of the argument, showing a balanced view on the topic.

coherence cohesion

Your conclusion effectively summarizes your points and reiterates your stance, providing a clear end to your essay.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

284 words

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In the digital age, video games, and TV consumption has increased. The same can have deleterious effects on a child's mental health. To what extent would you support this idea?

Your opinion

An increasing number of people are choosing to have cosmetic surgery in order to improve their appearance. Why are more people choosing to have operation to change the way they look? Do you think this a positive or negative development?

Many student choose to take a gap year before starting university, to travel or gain work experience. Do you think this is a good idea or a waste of time? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some people say that the governments should pay for health care and education but others think that this is not the government's responsibility.Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Some people think that teachers should be responsible for teaching students how to judge right from wrong and how to behave well. Some say that teachers should only teach students academic subjects. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

The internet has become so efficient and popular that many people rely on it for learning. Some suggest that it could replace the use of books as the main source of knowledge for education. Do you support or oppose the opinion? Explain your position.