IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The diagram below shows the changes of the town named Shakefield from 1995 until now. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparison where relevant.

The diagram below shows the changes of the town named Shakefield from 1995 until now. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparison where relevant.
The maps illustrate the transformation of Shakefield
town
Use synonyms
 from 1995 to the present day.
Overall
Linking Words
, the area has shifted from a predominantly agricultural and low-density area to a more developed urban centre with the introduction of expanded housing, recreational facilities and commercial amenities.
Additionally
Linking Words
,
while
Linking Words
 the modernisation has made way for new developments
such
Linking Words
 as a golf course, tennis courses and a restaurant complex, it has
also
Linking Words
 led to the removal of a sports facility, a morning
fish
Use synonyms
 boat and a
fish
Use synonyms
 market. In 1995, the
town
Use synonyms
 boasted a leafy environment, with agricultural land occupying the northeast sector. Adjacent to the farmland was a city park, which bordered a hotel. Across the hotel stood a café , and at the other end of the road contained a sports facility and a limited number of housing developments. The southern part of the
town
Use synonyms
 featured a
fish
Use synonyms
 market
at the end
Linking Words
 of the north-south road, with a morning
fish
Use synonyms
 boat docked nearby. Since
then
Linking Words
, the
town
Use synonyms
 has undergone significant redevelopment. The former farmland has been converted into a golf course and tennis courts,
while
Linking Words
 the public park has been replaced by a row of holiday homes, adjacent to which is now a car park to accommodate increased traffic. The hotel has been enlarged,
along with
Linking Words
 housing quarters across the road, whose number has grown substantially.
Although
Linking Words
 the sports facility and
fish
Use synonyms
 market have been repurposed into a restaurant complex and more cottages , respectively, the café opposite has remained intact.
Finally
Linking Words
, the morning
fish
Use synonyms
 boat has been discontinued.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words town, fish with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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