IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The chart below shows the value of one country’s exports in various categories during 2015 and 2016. The table shows the percentage change in each category of exports in 2016 compared with 2015.

The chart below shows the value of one country’s exports in various categories during 2015 and 2016. The table shows the percentage change in each category of exports in 2016 compared with 2015.
The bar chart illustrates the export values of a particular country across different sectors in 2015 and 2016,
while
Linking Words
 the table presents the percentage change in export figures for each sector between the two years.
Overall
Linking Words
, more than half
billion
Correct article usage
a billion
show examples
 earnings are
Use synonyms
petroleum
Change preposition
from petroleum
show examples
products
Use synonyms
 and engineered
goods
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 others
almost
Verb problem
are almost
show examples
 a quarter. The most enormous
changed
Replace the word
change
show examples
 is textiles. In
2015
Punctuation problem
2015,
show examples
petroleum
Use synonyms
products
Use synonyms
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 60
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 engineered
goods
Use synonyms
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 more than 50.
Linking Words
However
Punctuation problem
However,
show examples
 between 2015 and
2016
Punctuation problem
2016,
show examples
 engineered
goods
Use synonyms
 steadily increased to around 62,
while
Linking Words
petroleum
Use synonyms
products
Use synonyms
 stayed
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
.
Linking Words
Subsequently
Add a comma
Subsequently,
show examples
 gems and jewellery considerably decreased, but agricultural
products
Use synonyms
 didn’t
have
Verb problem
apply
show examples
any
Fix the agreement mistake
apply
show examples
changes
Correct subject-verb agreement
change
show examples
. Over the period
textiles
Punctuation problem
, textiles
show examples
the
Verb problem
rose the
show examples
 most
raised
Verb problem
apply
show examples
with 15.24
percent
Use the right word
per cent
show examples
. Meanwhile, gems and jewellery and
petroleum
Use synonyms
products
Use synonyms
were
Verb problem
apply
show examples
grew
with
Change preposition
by
show examples
 5.18% and 3% respectively. Eventually only agricultural
products
Use synonyms
 were experience raise which marks the least one was the lowest year.The
overall
Linking Words
 data suggests that the country maintained strong performance in heavy industry exports,
while
Linking Words
 lighter sectors like gems and agricultural
goods
Use synonyms
 showed modest or negative trends.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "overall, while".
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words petroleum, products, goods with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentage" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "change" was used 3 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • exports
  • categories
  • value
  • percentage change
  • compare
  • trends
  • changes
  • chart
  • table
  • overview
  • introduce
  • highlight
  • describe
  • summarize
  • information
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