IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

In many countries, people have to pay for medical care, but some think that it should be a free service provided by the government. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Medical
care
Use synonyms
 plays an important role in every
country
Use synonyms
 because
as
Punctuation problem
, as
show examples
 per
Correct article usage
a survey
show examples
survey
Punctuation problem
survey,
show examples
 if the medical system is
best
Correct article usage
the best
show examples
 in any
country
Use synonyms
 ,
then
Linking Words
 the
country
Use synonyms
 will grow
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
compared to
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
show examples
.
Linking Words
However
Punctuation problem
However,
show examples
 some
people
Use synonyms
 say that society has to pay for their medical
care
Use synonyms
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
in
Linking Words
contrast
Punctuation problem
contrast,
show examples
 some said it should be free ,so in my
opinion
Punctuation problem
opinion,
show examples
i
Fix capitalization
I
show examples
 am
partelly
Correct your spelling
partly
 agree with that
, i
Punctuation problem
. I
show examples
 am writing
paragraphes
Correct your spelling
paragraphs
 to support my views.
To begin
Linking Words
,
socity
Correct your spelling
society
 has to pay for medical
Use synonyms
care
Punctuation problem
care,
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 will directly or indirectly will
benefical
Correct your spelling
beneficial
 for the
government
Use synonyms
 , so they can provide their best services to
people
Use synonyms
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
people
Use synonyms
also
Linking Words
 get
chance
Correct article usage
a chance
show examples
 to take
care
Use synonyms
 of their health
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
that is
Linking Words
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 win-win situation for both.
Linking Words
Moreover
Add a comma
Moreover,
show examples
 as we
Correct your spelling
know
konw
Punctuation problem
konw,
show examples
 there are some
diesease
Correct your spelling
diseases
 that we
d
Verb problem
apply
show examples
do not have medicines so if the money
paid
Verb problem
is paid
show examples
 by the
people
Use synonyms
Linking Words
then
Punctuation problem
, then
show examples
Use synonyms
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 can
resersch
Correct your spelling
research
 to cure the disease.
Linking Words
however
Fix capitalization
However
show examples
, medical
care
Use synonyms
 should be free for
peolpe
Correct your spelling
people
 because
some time
Use the right word
sometimes
show examples
people
Use synonyms
does
Correct subject-verb agreement
do
show examples
 not have money to get the medicines , if they
did
Wrong verb form
do
show examples
 not get the medical
at
Check wording
care at
show examples
right
Correct article usage
the right
show examples
 time
Linking Words
then
Punctuation problem
, then
show examples
person
Correct article usage
the person
show examples
 will die and it will huge loss to their family.
Linking Words
Furthermore
Add a comma
Furthermore,
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 do work for the
country
Use synonyms
 and
government
Use synonyms
 to grow their domain , to boost their economy
so
Punctuation problem
, so
show examples
Use synonyms
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 should pay for their medical
care
Use synonyms
.
To conclude
Linking Words
Punctuation problem
, its
show examples
its
Use the right word
it's
show examples
 both
Correct article usage
the responsibity
show examples
responsibity
Correct your spelling
responsibility
government
Use synonyms
 and
person
Correct article usage
the person
show examples
 for the medical
care
Use synonyms
.
people
Use synonyms
 should pay for their treatment and
Use synonyms
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
sholud
Correct your spelling
should
 give free medical
care
Use synonyms
 at
Correct article usage
a certin
show examples
certin
Correct your spelling
certain
 level,

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task achievement
Make sure to clearly state your opinion in the introduction. Use phrases like 'I agree' or 'I disagree.'
coherence and cohesion
Separate your ideas into clear paragraphs. Each paragraph should focus on one main idea.
task achievement
Use simple examples to support your points. For instance, you can mention a specific disease that needs funding for research.
coherence and cohesion
Check spelling and grammar. Make sure to spell words correctly like 'society', 'disease', and 'responsibility'.
task achievement
You presented both sides of the argument, which shows good understanding of the topic.
coherence and cohesion
Your conclusion nicely summarizes the main points of the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • universal coverage
  • equity
  • fundamental human right
  • out-of-pocket expenses
  • financial hardship
  • preventative measures
  • social contract
  • quality of care
  • high demand
  • limited resources
  • tax implications
  • budget priorities
  • universal healthcare systems
  • public health
  • disease burden
What to do next:
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