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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

PThe chart below shows the value of one country’s exports in various categories during 2015 and 2016. The table shows the percentage change n each category of exports in 2016 compared with 2015.

PThe chart below shows the value of one country’s exports in various categories during 2015 and 2016. The table shows the percentage change n each category of exports in 2016 compared with 2015.
The chart depicts the value of one nation's exports of Petroleum
products
Use synonyms
, Engineered
goods
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, Gems and jewellery, Agricultural
products
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 and Textiles
.
Punctuation problem
apply
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 from 2015 to 2016. The table
also
Linking Words
 illustrates the ratio of
goods
Use synonyms
 changes between 2015 to 2016.
Overall
Linking Words
,
it is clear that
Linking Words
 in 2016 the country had climbed in terms of exports compared to 2015. The ratio indicates that the Textile industry had a phenomenal uplift compared to others.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, Petroleum
products
Use synonyms
, Engineered
Correct your spelling
and engineered
goods
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 in 2015 were the most exported
products
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with
Punctuation problem
, with
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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estimated
revenue
Fix the agreement mistake
revenues
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 of 70
billion
Use synonyms
dollars
Use synonyms
 and 65
billion
Use synonyms
dollars
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, in
2016
Punctuation problem
2016,
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 both of the
products
Use synonyms
 had a climb in
sales
Use synonyms
 of 3% each .
In addition
Linking Words
, Textiles were the most in terms of export in 2015 , but in 2016 it went up by 15.24 per cent and secured the second
last
Linking Words
 place.
Therefore
Linking Words
, the Gems and jewellery alone were securing
sales
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 around 52
billion
Use synonyms
dollars
Use synonyms
 after
Engineered
Fix capitalization
engineered
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goods
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, but in the year
2016
Add a comma
2016,
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 the
sales
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 dropped by 5.18%.
Besides
Linking Words
 that, Agricultural
product
Fix the agreement mistake
products
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 had a very minor uplift in
sales
Use synonyms
, roughly 0.81% with the total revenue of around 47
billion
Use synonyms
dollars
Use synonyms
.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words products, goods, billion, dollars, sales with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "compared" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "ratio" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "climbed" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "uplift" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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