IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 1.5

Women and men are commonly seen as having different strengths and weaknesses. Is it right to exclude males or females from certain professions because of their gender? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

There are different opinions about
this
Linking Words
 topic. In my opinion, I believe that
women
Use synonyms
 and
men
Use synonyms
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
 big differences in other things
,
Punctuation problem
.
show examples
 In
this
Linking Words
 writing, I will explain my reasons and give examples. First of all,
Women
Use synonyms
 are good
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 some things
but
Punctuation problem
, but
show examples
male
Check wording
men
show examples
 can't do
,
Punctuation problem
.
show examples
For example
Linking Words
, it because the strong body
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
male
Check wording
men
show examples
 has Benefits
,
Punctuation problem
.
show examples
This
Linking Words
 shows that
women
Use synonyms
 and
male
Check wording
men
show examples
 are different in some
place
Check wording
ways
show examples
. Another important reason is that
Women
Use synonyms
 are good for design
Linking Words
For
Punctuation problem
. For
show examples
 instance,
men
Use synonyms
 are good for carrying things because
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
the
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
good
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
string
Use the right word
strong
show examples
they have
Verb problem
muscles
show examples
Punctuation problem
.
show examples
This
Linking Words
 means that
men
Use synonyms
 and
women
Use synonyms
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
 big differences. In conclusion, I strongly believe that
Women
Use synonyms
 and
men
Use synonyms
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 the
Completion
Check wording
complement
show examples
 for each other, because of the reasons I mentioned above.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Make sure to clearly state your main points in each paragraph. Each point should be well developed with supporting ideas.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words like 'first', 'also', and 'finally' to help the flow of your ideas. This makes it easier for the reader to follow your essay.
task achievement
Be careful with language use, such as plural and singular forms, to avoid making mistakes that can confuse the reader.
task achievement
You have a clear opinion throughout your essay, which is a strong point.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • gender stereotypes
  • societal views
  • inherent biases
  • professional capabilities
  • gender inclusivity
  • equal opportunities
  • diversity
  • unique perspectives
  • physical attributes
  • psychological attributes
  • workplace adaptations
  • modern advancements
  • legal frameworks
  • gender discrimination
  • ethical implications
  • career opportunities
  • case studies
  • real-world examples
  • traditionally dominated
  • successful outcomes
  • atypical roles
What to do next:
Look at other essays: