IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people say history is one the most important school subjects. Other people think that, in today’s world, subjects like science and technology are more important than history.

School
subjects
Use synonyms
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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 the topic that sparks huge debates nowadays.
While
Linking Words
 some individuals believe that history should be taught more than other
subjets
Use the right word
subjects
show examples
, other people think lessons like science and technology have more significance in modern
time
Fix the agreement mistake
times
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. I assume that, in today’s world, students have to develop in various fields that
includes
Correct subject-verb agreement
include
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 all these
subjects
Use synonyms
. The argument of people
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
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stands
Correct subject-verb agreement
stand
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 for history is that previous mistakes may help students avert them in the future. History makes it possible to look at events that took place before, and
analyze
Use the right word
analyse
show examples
 ancestors’
action
Fix the agreement mistake
actions
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 and
its
Fix the agreement mistake
their
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 implications. To be clear, with the help of reflection
of
Change preposition
on
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 past
events
Punctuation problem
events,
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 people can anticipate possible
consequnces
Correct your spelling
consequences
 and take appropriate steps towards some problems.
For example
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, after
Second
Correct article usage
the Second
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 World
War
Punctuation problem
War,
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 a lot of steps were taken by international
cooperations
Fix the agreement mistake
cooperation
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 to
not let start
Verb problem
prevent
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 another war again. Historical lessons in schools
take
Verb problem
play
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 a huge part
to
Change preposition
in
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 not
let
Wrong verb form
letting
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next
Correct article usage
the next
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 generations
to
Verb problem
apply
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forget about
this
Linking Words
 war
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
and make the same mistakes.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
, proponents of technology and science
subjects
Use synonyms
 state that to chase modern technological
demands
Punctuation problem
demands,
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 it is crucial to develop
this
Linking Words
 sector from
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
school times. To be precise, paying more attention to these
subjects
Use synonyms
 may encourage students to bond their lives with them and make a meaningful contribution to
maintaing
Correct your spelling
maintaining
this
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 industry. A brilliant illustration of it is robotics competitions among pupils, who learn science and technology
subjects
Use synonyms
. Some of the innovative ideas, which
children
Check wording
children's
show examples
 shows
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 are integrating
to
Change preposition
into
show examples
real life
Use the right word
real-life
show examples
 projects.
For instance
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, the winners of
World
Correct article usage
the World
show examples
 Robotics Olympiad used their project to clean a real sea
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
 oil.
As a result
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,
this
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 shows how these
subjects
Use synonyms
 may help to foster technological development.
To sum up
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, all these
subjects
Use synonyms
 have a great impact on mankind and its
further
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 development.
However
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, from my point of view,
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 right combination of them may help us to reach our goals faster by not letting individuals make mistakes again and increasing technological growth.

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure your ideas flow logically from one to another. Use linking words to connect sentences better.
task achievement
Work on clarity in your ideas to make your arguments more straightforward and easy to understand.
task achievement
Provide more specific and relevant examples to support your points. This will make your arguments stronger.
task achievement
You provide a balanced view by mentioning both history and technology, which shows a good understanding of the topic.
coherence and cohesion
Your conclusion effectively sums up your points and gives a clear opinion on the topic.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Cultural heritage
  • Historical perspective
  • Analytical skills
  • Contextual understanding
  • Technological advancements
  • STEM (Science, Technology, Engineering, Mathematics)
  • Innovation
  • Interdisciplinary
  • Job market
  • Climate crisis
  • Cultural identity
  • Critical thinking
  • Humanities
  • Contemporary issues
  • Integration
  • Tech-savvy
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