IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

Some people enjoy change in life. While other people try to avoid it. What are the advantages and disadvantages of both approaches.

There is an ongoing debate about life change, some argue that they are
delight
Replace the word
delighted
show examples
 to make different
choicess
Correct your spelling
choices
,
while
Linking Words
 others try their best to avoid it.
This
Linking Words
 essay will discuss the pros and the drawbacks.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, many
people
Use synonyms
 have made different
choicess
Correct your spelling
choices
 in a certain matter, they are running out from
stressful
Correct article usage
the stressful
show examples
aspect
Fix the agreement mistake
aspects
show examples
 of life to comfortable
one
Fix the agreement mistake
ones
show examples
,
as well as
Linking Words
 when
people
Use synonyms
 make mistakes, they must know that they have a second chance.
For example
Linking Words
, the workers who
desides
Correct your spelling
decide
 lifestain
choisess
Correct your spelling
choices
 of
his
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 occupation, sometimes
he
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
 make
mistake
Fix the agreement mistake
mistakes
show examples
,
Linking Words
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 is why
must
Correct pronoun usage
they must
show examples
 have the chance to go back from his
ideas
Check wording
minds
show examples
.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
, the disadvantages of having the choice to make changes in your life
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 may be late sometimes to take
actions
Fix the agreement mistake
action
show examples
, so you must take
intro
Use the right word
into
show examples
 consideration the right time.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the idea of changing commonly
hurt
Wrong verb form
hurts
show examples
people
Use synonyms
, like if someone had ordered from a
restaurent
Correct your spelling
restaurant
 30 burgers, and when it
ready
Verb problem
was ready
show examples
 to
delivered
Verb problem
be delivered
show examples
, the customer
has
Wrong verb form
had
show examples
 cancelled.
For instance
Linking Words
, a quite portion of junk food consumers
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
 30% waste of fast food,
due to
Linking Words
 the
people
Use synonyms
 calling
them
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 refunds. In
conclussion
Correct your spelling
conclusion
, there
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 different points of view
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
this
Linking Words
 question. On balance,
however
Linking Words
. may be good for
same
Use the right word
some
show examples
, and bad for others, but must consider the timing, and if it is hurting others.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Your introduction should clearly present both sides of the argument more directly to set the stage for your essay.
coherence cohesion
Make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea and that you follow it with examples or explanations to support it.
coherence cohesion
Try to link your ideas more clearly, for instance, using transition words like 'firstly', 'on the other hand', and 'in conclusion'.
task response
You present interesting points about change and stability in life.
task response
You somewhat address both sides of the topic, which shows an understanding of the task.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: