IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The line graph compares the population growth in India and China from 2000 and gives projections until 2050, based on data from the UN Population Division.

The line graph compares the population growth in India and China from 2000 and gives projections until 2050, based on data from the UN Population Division.
The line graph compares the rise of
population
Use synonyms
 between two different countries ,
such
Linking Words
 as
India
Use synonyms
 and
China
Use synonyms
 , from 2000 to 2050, based on data from the Division of UN
Population
Use synonyms
.
Check wording
Division.
show examples
Overall
Linking Words
, the chart illustrates that in
India
Use synonyms
, the
population
Use synonyms
 has increased gradually,
while
Linking Words
 in
China
Use synonyms
, their
population
Use synonyms
 has remained relatively stable. In
India
Use synonyms
, there was a significant growth of
population
Use synonyms
 in different years. 1
billion
Use synonyms
 people lived in
India
Use synonyms
 in 2000,
while
Linking Words
 in
China
Use synonyms
, it was 1.2
billion
Use synonyms
. Afterwards, the
population
Use synonyms
 Use synonyms communityculturepeoplepopulacepublicsocietystatecitizenrydenizensdwellers It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 you want to do the opposite for a high band score. had grown in both countries rapidly. In 2020, the
population
Use synonyms
 of
China
Use synonyms
 and
India
Use synonyms
 was approximately 1.4
billion
Use synonyms
. In 2030, the growth of
population
Use synonyms
 will reach over 1.4
billion
Use synonyms
 in
China
Use synonyms
 and
India
Use synonyms
 , respectively. After that, the
population
Use synonyms
 of
China
Use synonyms
 will decrease at a low rate.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, in
India
Use synonyms
, the growth of
population
Use synonyms
 will be rising at a higher rate. It is interesting to note that the
population
Use synonyms
 of
India
Use synonyms
 will reach almost 1.6
billion
Use synonyms
,
whereas
Linking Words
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
China
Use synonyms
 shows exactly 1.4
billion
Use synonyms
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
▼
Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 75%.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words population, india, china, billion with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "compares" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "data" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "show" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "growth" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "reach" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the ninth paragraph.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • line graph
  • compare
  • population growth
  • India
  • China
  • projections
  • data
  • year
  • significant
  • shift
  • trends
  • stabilize
  • challenges
  • opportunities
  • larger
  • faster
  • highlight
  • change
  • show
  • expect
  • rate
What to do next:
Look at other essays: