Many governments have laws that ban the sale and use of hard drugs such as heroin and cocaine, yet they allow people to buy drugs such as tobacco and alcohol. Laws that prohibit the sale and use of hard drugs should be applied to all drugs, including tobacco and alcohol. What is your opinion?

Government decisions about which
drugs
Use synonyms
are made legal or illegal receive diverse public responses. The significant societal and
health
Use synonyms
problems
Use synonyms
caused by legal
drugs
Use synonyms
,
such
Linking Words
as
tobacco
Use synonyms
and
alcohol
Use synonyms
, have led many
people
Use synonyms
to advocate for them to be made illegal
like
Punctuation problem
, like
show examples
heroin or cocaine.
However
Linking Words
, I believe that despite their potential harm,
tobacco
Use synonyms
and
alcohol
Use synonyms
should be legal. It is true that
drugs
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
as
tobacco
Use synonyms
and
alcohol
Use synonyms
can cause substantial
health
Use synonyms
risks and societal concerns.
Tobacco
Use synonyms
use is associated with
health
Use synonyms
problems
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
as cancer and heart
diseases
Fix the agreement mistake
disease
show examples
Linking Words
while
Punctuation problem
, while
show examples
second-hand smoke adversely affects nearby individuals.
Similarly
Linking Words
, excessive
alcohol
Use synonyms
consumption can contribute to mental
health
Use synonyms
problems
Use synonyms
, liver disease.
Moreover
Linking Words
, when
people
Use synonyms
are under the influence of
Use synonyms
alcohol
Punctuation problem
alcohol,
show examples
it can lead to aggressive behaviour.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
, these types of
drugs
Use synonyms
should not be subjected to the same strict laws as hard
drugs
Use synonyms
like cocaine and heroin, as they are substantially less damaging and addictive.
For instance
Linking Words
, many
people
Use synonyms
are able to enjoy a safe number of alcoholic beverages without compromising their
health
Use synonyms
or endangering the public.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, when consumed in moderation,
alcohol
Use synonyms
plays an important role in helping
people
Use synonyms
to relax and enjoy themselves in social situations.
While
Linking Words
tobacco
Use synonyms
is certainly unhealthy, its prohibition may drive users to obtain the substance illegally or to turn to more
dangerous
Check wording
dangerous substances
show examples
alternatives. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
alcohol
Use synonyms
and
tobacco
Use synonyms
do have
problems
Use synonyms
for both
people
Use synonyms
’s
health
Use synonyms
and society, these
problems
Use synonyms
are not severe enough to justify making them illegal.
Instead
Linking Words
, public advertising campaigns and educational policies should be put in place to help individuals make wise decisions about how to use these
drugs
Use synonyms
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

content
Your view is clear and the main idea stays the same. To reach a higher score, add stronger proof for each idea and name more reasons or facts.
structure
Make the flow smooth. Use a clear topic sentence at the start of each paragraph and a link word to join ideas. Keep sentences short.
structure
Include one or two ideas from the other side, then show why your view is better. This helps show balance and thinking.
strength
Clear view on the topic from the start.
strength
Good use of some linking words to move ideas.
strength
The end sums up the view.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Chronic diseases
  • Substance abuse
  • Psychological dependency
  • Social stigma
  • Preventive measures
  • Legislative framework
  • Healthcare expenditure
  • Judicial system
  • Prohibition era
  • Civil liberties
  • Tax revenues
  • Harm reduction
  • Ethical considerations
  • Public health policy
  • Addiction treatment
What to do next:
Look at other essays: