IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

The rapid rise of artificial intelligence (AI) in various industries is leading to job displacement and unemployment for many workers. What are the reasons for this trend? What solutions can be implemented by the government to address these issues?

As
Correct article usage
the developed
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developed
Replace the word
development
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 of Artificial intelligence in various industries which highly displacement of
jobs
Use synonyms
 which
contributed
Wrong verb form
contributing
show examples
 to
unemploument
Correct your spelling
unemployment
 for many people. The main reason
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
this
Linking Words
 tendency
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 low cost,
fasttern
Correct your spelling
faster
 results.
However
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 issue can be implemented by the
governement strickty
Correct your spelling
government strictly
 Al.... The development of AI which the main contribution of
workers
Use synonyms
 losing their
jobs
Use synonyms
. AI not only
taken
Wrong verb form
takes
show examples
people
Check wording
people's
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jobs
Use synonyms
, Ai
also
Linking Words
taken
Wrong verb form
takes
show examples
 part
of
Change preposition
in
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 education. Many students
nowaday
Use the right word
nowadays
show examples
using
Wrong verb form
use
show examples
 AI to do their assessments. As a
results
Fix the agreement mistake
result
show examples
, many
workers
Use synonyms
faking
Verb problem
are faking
show examples
 their
CV
Fix the agreement mistake
CVs
show examples
which
Punctuation problem
, which
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lead
Correct subject-verb agreement
leads
show examples
 to
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
show examples
 of experience
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
contribute
Correct subject-verb agreement
contributes
show examples
 to AI taking over
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
many industries. Another reason is that
workers
Use synonyms
takes
Correct subject-verb agreement
take
show examples
 more time when AI take less time and effective results. To address
Linking Words
this
Fix the agreement mistake
these
show examples
 solutions,
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 will
plays
Wrong verb form
play
show examples
 a crucial
roles
Fix the agreement mistake
role
show examples
 in
Linking Words
this
Fix the agreement mistake
these
show examples
 situations.
First,
Linking Words
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 need to
limitted
Correct your spelling
limit
Ai
Use the right word
AI
show examples
 users for
company
Fix the agreement mistake
companies
show examples
 as well
creating
Wrong verb form
as create
show examples
 more
jobs
Use synonyms
 for people by training
wokers
Correct your spelling
workers
 to focus on digital and coding
Linking Words
as
Punctuation problem
, as
show examples
 well as
problem solving
Correct your spelling
problem-solving, so
 they can transition into
jobs
Use synonyms
 that complement AI rather than compete with it.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
econdly
Correct your spelling
secondly
, governments can support job creation in emerging industries,
such
Linking Words
 as renewable energy, healthcare, and creative sectors, where human skills remain indispensable.
Finally
Linking Words
, introducing social safety nets, including unemployment benefits and universal basic income pilots, can provide temporary support for
workers
Use synonyms
 affected by automation
while
Linking Words
 they adjust to the evolving
labor
Use the right word
labour
show examples
 market. In conclusion, AI is replacing human
labor
Use the right word
labour
show examples
 because of its efficiency, cost-effectiveness, and advanced capabilities.
However
Linking Words
, through reskilling initiatives, job creation policies, and stronger social protections, governments can ensure that technological progress benefits both businesses and
workers
Use synonyms
.

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overall
What this essay does well: it shows a plan for the go v to help and a link from AI to jobs. It is not in a neat flow. The words have many mistakes and the idea does not stay in one line.
task response
Task answer: It talks on both parts of the question, but it does not go into full detail. Add clear reasons for job loss and give one or two exact steps the gov can take, with a small plan.
coherence
Flow and link: Give one idea per para and use a clear order. Start with a short intro, then one idea in each para, and end with a short set con. Use link words like first, next, also, finally.
content
The plan to help with work and the idea of skills and safety nets are in the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • artificial intelligence
  • job displacement
  • unemployment
  • workers
  • technology
  • perform
  • tasks
  • faster
  • accurately
  • reducing
  • human workers
  • automate
  • advanced
  • industries
  • cut costs
  • increase efficiency
  • skills
  • compete
  • new jobs
  • government
  • solutions
  • address
  • issues
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