IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people like to try new things, for example, places to visit and types of food. Other people prefer to keep doing things they are familiar with. Discuss both these attitudes and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

With the advancement in technology and the boom of social media, exploring lifestyles and
activities
Use synonyms
 differs from one individual to another. Various factors govern the way
people
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 pursue their day-to-day
activities
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 and lifestyles. Some individuals think that working on
things
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 that are known to them would be more favourable,
while
Linking Words
 others think that moving out of their comfort zone and trying out various adventures,
such
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 as exploring new
places
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 and eating different delicacies, would be more preferred. I will discuss both
the
Correct article usage
apply
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views and provide proper reasons
along with
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 examples. Exploring different
activities
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 and doing
things
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 that
people
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 have never done before definitely requires a strong mindset and courage to perform those tasks.
Its
Use the right word
It's
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 never easy for them to go with these options, but they take it as a challenge and try to do some adventures. Social media and movies have influenced
people
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 to explore
things
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 and
places
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 that could be beyond one's imagination.
People
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 post photos and videos of
places
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 that could be eye-catching to other individuals, and they even think of visiting with their near and dear ones. Food bloggers
also
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 post delicious and mouth-watering cuisines, which attract
people
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 and encourage them to visit those
places
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.
While
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 others opine that they get more joy from doing
things
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 that they do regularly. Some individuals are scared to explore new
places
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 or cuisines, and they are
also
Linking Words
 bound by the responsibilities of their life, which prevents them from trying new
activities
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, and they don't have enough time to explore. Married couples, after they give birth to their child they get busy nurturing and taking care of their child, so they don't get enough time to explore
places
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 or restaurants. These
people
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 have a mentality of exploring those
places
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 which are famous, and which they
previously
Verb problem
have previously
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had
Verb problem
apply
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better experienced
Correct word order
experienced better
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, so that they don't get disappointed.
Hence
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, I feel that performing
activities
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 out of their comfort zone or doing
things
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 that they are familiar with changes from one individual to another, which can depend on various factors
such
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 as lifestyle, upbringing, and willpower.

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clarity
State a clear opinion at the end and make it easy to see in the start and end of the essay.
examples
Add more real life examples from your own life or job to show your view.
cohesion
Use simple link words to tie ideas like also, but, for example, and end a paragraph with a clear idea.
grammar
Check small grammar mistakes and keep long sentences short for easier read.
structure
Make a simple plan before you write: one view, the other view, then your view in the end.
content
You show both sides of the topic.
structure
You use ideas from real life such as social media and food blogs.
coherence
The topic is clear and you keep to the task.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Novelty
  • Routine
  • Comfort zone
  • Risk-taker
  • Risk-averse
  • Enrichment
  • Personal growth
  • Innovation
  • Creativity
  • Stability
  • Tradition
  • Habit
  • Familiarity
  • Personal enrichment
  • Life stages
  • Fulfilling
What to do next:
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