IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

Nowadays there are more opportunities for women than there were in the past. Some people think this situation has caused more problems than it has solved. What are your opinions on this?

In
morden
Correct word choice
the modern
show examples
 era,
men
Use synonyms
 and
women
Use synonyms
 are equal
having
Punctuation problem
, having
show examples
 the same
opportuinies
Correct your spelling
opportunities
 to grow, build
career
Correct article usage
a career
show examples
 and
have
Verb problem
be
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
respect
Replace the word
respected
show examples
 in every field. Some people have totally opposite opinions on that. They think
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
this
Linking Words
 creates the problem rather than
it
Verb problem
solving it
show examples
has solved
Verb problem
apply
show examples
. In
21st
Correct article usage
the 21st
show examples
 century, everyone
think
Correct subject-verb agreement
thinks
show examples
 about equal rights and opportunities for
men
Use synonyms
 and
women
Use synonyms
. In the past, Only
men
Use synonyms
 could go
on
Change preposition
to
show examples
 work to earn and had a
resonsiblity
Correct your spelling
responsibility
 for
family
Correct article usage
the family
show examples
 in
term
Fix the agreement mistake
terms
show examples
 of money and security
Linking Words
whereas
Punctuation problem
, whereas
show examples
women
Use synonyms
 had to take care of the household activities
such
Linking Words
 as making food for
family
Correct article usage
the family
show examples
, cleaning the house, taking care of
child
Correct article usage
the child
show examples
etc
Punctuation problem
, etc
show examples
. Today's
women
Use synonyms
 have more opportunities to
grown
Wrong verb form
grow
show examples
 themselves
Linking Words
such
Punctuation problem
, such
show examples
 as
go
Wrong verb form
going
show examples
 out
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
late
Change preposition
at nights
show examples
nights
Fix the agreement mistake
night
show examples
,
earn
Wrong verb form
earning
show examples
 money,
fulfill
Wrong verb form
and fulfilling
show examples
 their dreams. Some people
thinks
Correct subject-verb agreement
think
show examples
 that
self independent
Use the right word
self-independent
show examples
women
Use synonyms
doesnot
Verb problem
do not
show examples
 care about
men
Use synonyms
. Once they
are starting
Verb problem
start earning
show examples
 to earn more than their
men
Use synonyms
,
women
Use synonyms
are being
Verb problem
become
show examples
 egoistic and do not respect their
men
Use synonyms
. They
also
Linking Words
 believe that after some point,
women
Use synonyms
thinks
Correct subject-verb agreement
think
show examples
 that they do not need
men
Use synonyms
.
Women
Use synonyms
 do have time
to
Verb problem
apply
show examples
to balance personal and professional life.
Women
Use synonyms
 take a job of
men
Use synonyms
 because
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
this
Linking Words
 day by day
Use synonyms
men
Punctuation problem
, men
show examples
 are going to be in depressed. In my opinion,
Both
Fix capitalization
both
show examples
 have similar
opportuinies
Correct your spelling
opportunities
 to grow and to be in the competition of being rich. If someday
women
Use synonyms
 go
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 work,
men
Use synonyms
 should handle the household things as vice
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
versa.
Women
Use synonyms
 are
more
Fix the agreement mistake
apply
show examples
stronger
Linking Words
then
Use the right word
than
show examples
men
Use synonyms
to handle
Change preposition
in handling
show examples
 pressure and
find
Wrong verb form
finding
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
solutions
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 all problems.

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structure
Organise the essay with a clear intro, 2-3 body parts, and a short end.
content
Give a real example or detail to back each idea.
language
Use simple grammar and check spelling and punctuation.
coherence
Use linking words to join ideas and guide the reader.
content
Some good ideas on how life for women has changed.
structure
The writer tries to compare past and now.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • gender equality
  • social justice
  • economic development
  • innovation
  • traditional family roles
  • shared responsibilities
  • diverse perspectives
  • creativity
  • decision-making
  • educational opportunities
  • work-life balance
  • traditionalists
  • societal friction
  • gender roles
What to do next:
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