IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

– BRIEF – PRACTICE 2 We should stop wasting money on alternative energy sources (for example, solar and wind power) because they are too unreliable to ever replace coal and oil. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

A growing number of individuals today express concern over the replacement of fossil fuels by renewable
energy
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 sources. They believe that we should stop investing in these
resources
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due to
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 their feasibility. From my perspective, I completely disagree with
this
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 suggestion based on some reasons that are explained in
this
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 essay.
Firstly
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, the foremost argument to justify my stand is that using alternative
energy
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 sources is a significant measure for tackling environmental problems nowadays.
In other words
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, employing solar or wind power can solve the resource exhaustion situation, which is caused by overexploitation. The amount of gas emissions has been reduced by using
energy
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 produced by natural
resources
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, helping moderate climate change.
Hence
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, it becomes evident that alternative
energy
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 has a direct impact on environmental conservation.
Furthermore
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, the other reason to prove my point is the economic benefits of renewable
energy
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resources
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 in the long term. People can
recognize
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recognise
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 the fact that renewables cost are stable in the global market than fossil fuels, which
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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 going to be exhausted in the near future. Another essential point to make is that some countries can be independent in
energy
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, resulting from without importing
energy
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 can reduced state expenditure. A prime illustration of
this
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 point is that many provinces in the world have seen a decrease in expenses after applying renewable sources to citizens’ lives. In conclusion, I firmly disagree with preventing clean
energy
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resources
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 expenses because these
energy
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resources
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 contribute to environmental protection and economic growth. It is hoped that individuals will respond to
this
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 statement for the long-term development of the planet.

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task response
Your choice and view are clear. Add more detail for each reason and give real life examples to back them up.
coherence
Use simple and clear links between ideas. Start each paragraph with a strong sentence that tells its main idea.
language
Improve grammar and word form. Check phrases like 'renewables cost are stable' and 'energy can reduced state expenditure'.
structure
End with a stronger conclusion that restates your view and the two main points.
task response
You state a clear view against the idea.
coherence
You use connecting words to show order.
structure
There is paragraphing and focus on topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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