IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

You recently moved to a new city to start your studies. You would like to find a part-time job to support yourself during your time there. Write a letter to a friend who already lives in the city and ask for some help. In your letter, include: Details of your study plans The reasons why you'd like to get a part-time job. Suggestions on how your friend could help you find a suitable job

Dear Amrit, How are you? I hope you've been well. You will be glad to know that I
finally
Linking Words
 got into my dream university to pursue my higher education in Food Science and Technology. I recently came to Canada
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 the
starting
Replace the word
start
show examples
 of August, and my college is supposed to start in September. We have been friends
from
Change preposition
for
show examples
 years
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 you already know my family's financial condition. They pulled out all their savings and took a loan to send me to a college I was interested in.
Therefore
Linking Words
, I do not want to be a burden on them anymore, so I decided to work part-time
while
Linking Words
 completing my studies. Since you have been living in Canada
from
Change preposition
for
show examples
Linking Words
last
Correct article usage
the last
show examples
 three years, is it possible for you to assist me in finding a job? I have already
build
Wrong verb form
built
show examples
 my resume, would you mind reviewing it once before I start applying for jobs
.
Change the punctuation
?
show examples
Also
Linking Words
, if you
got
Verb problem
have
show examples
 time
this
Linking Words
 weekend, can I come over
at
Change preposition
to
show examples
 your place
Linking Words
then
Punctuation problem
, then
show examples
 you can help me in searching for a job. I can't wait to see you and cherish our old memories together. Your friend, Simran

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structure
Try to keep one idea in each paragraph. Put a new idea in a new paragraph.
grammar
Fix small grammar parts. Use 'built' not 'build', 'for three years' not 'from last three years', 'start of August' rather than 'in the starting of August'.
content
Make the ask for help clear at the start or end so the reader sees it fast.
tone
Use a kind and calm tone when you ask for help. Say thanks at the end.
content
The letter shows care for family and a plan to study.
content
It says you want to work to pay for things while you study.
tone
The tone is polite and friendly.
structure
The closing feels warm.

The Closing

The style of the letter determine how you have to close it.

Check out the suggested closing sentences for each type of letter in the General IELTS Test. The closing sentence should be the last sentence of your letter.

Formal style (To someone you have not met, whose name you don’t know)

  • Yours faithfully,

Semi-formal (To someone you may or may not have met, whose last name you know)

  • Yours sincerely,

Informal (To someone you know well, whose first name you know and use)

  • Best regards,
  • Warm wishes,

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