Education is the most powerful weapon which you can use to change the world. Do you agree or disagree with this point ?

Many
people
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believe that
education
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is the most important tool we can use to change the world.
While
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it is argued which level of
education
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is necessary, I believe that
individuals
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should have a
minimal
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minimum
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of basic
education
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that
applied
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applies
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between
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to
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society.
This
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essay will discuss the effect of
education
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to
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on
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the transformation of the world, especially
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individuals'
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on individuals'
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life
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lives
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.
Education
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can improve the transformation of
citizen's
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citizens'
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life
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lives
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if every
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individuals
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individual
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learn how to be better at a specific topic. As each
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people
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person
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had been given
with
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apply
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a different talent, they will become more expert to learn exactly
about
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apply
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what they already have from their genes.
For instance
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, German citizens are famously known
by
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for
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their expertise
of
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in
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technological things.
Therefore
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, its country is growing rapidly in
technological
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the technological
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sector.
While
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Chinese citizens are best with mathematics, in consequence, their country
are
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is
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growing fastly in
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education
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the education
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sector.
This
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indicate
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indicates
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that
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education
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education,
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if being treated correctly, could improve our
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life
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lives
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.
Besides
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literature based
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literature-based
show examples
knowledge, there is
also
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a
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apply
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knowledge about
manners
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, which is
also
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important to support
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individuals
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individuals'
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success.
Manners
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and intelligence are something to be
thaught
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taught
show examples
of since the
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from an early
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age of child.
For example
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, in Japan, children are required to have a basic
manner
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manners
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class before they enter
the
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apply
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school
era
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apply
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.
Therefore
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, every Japanese
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people
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person
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are
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is
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famously
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famous
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known with their good
manners
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, which
also
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contributing
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contributes
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to improving their
successfull
Correct your spelling
successful
life
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.
This
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exhibit
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exhibits
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that
education
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about
manners
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are
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is
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also
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important for the growth of humankind. In conclusion,
while
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literature based
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literature-based
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education
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are
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is
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powerful
to
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for
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the growth of
people
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, knowledge about
manners
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are
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is
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something that
individuals
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should have
,
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apply
show examples
to reach their fullest potential.

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task response
State your position clearly in the intro and keep it firm through the essay.
structure
Make a short plan before you write: one idea for why education helps, and one for the level of schooling.
grammar
Use simple, clear words and check word forms (child, people, world).
content
Give more real and exact examples and avoid wide, old words.
cohesion
Use linking words to join ideas (also, but, so) to make the flow smooth.
content
You show a clear idea of how education and manners may help.
structure
There is a clear start and end to the essay (intro and conclusion).
cohesion
You use some linking words inside the text.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example
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