The government should pay for large pieces of art for public display in outdoor places. Do you agree or disagree.

Nowadays, a wide range of
art
Use synonyms
is highly beneficial to express their emotions or feelings and boost people’s
both
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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imagination and creativity. The dictatorship should allocate the cash for enormous pieces of artwork for public demonstrate in outdoor places. To my understanding, I agree with the point of view
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due to
Change preposition
for
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some reasons. On the one hand, the majority of people
countenance
Verb problem
appreciate
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the way of
art
Use synonyms
because of some fascinating
sides
Check wording
aspects
show examples
. I am going to write some examples from scientists, namely, ‘’
Art
Use synonyms
reflects not only cultural identity globally but
also
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enhance
Correct subject-verb agreement
enhances
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our creativity
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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it has a number of benefits.’’
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Also
Add a comma
Also,
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I think so.
Additionally
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, it is much better to engage in painting or making some pictures in their mind for children to
their
Verb problem
stimulate their
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imagination. So, the government should spend money to develop special places for
creaters
Correct your spelling
creators
to represent their creative works.
Furthermore
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,
If
Fix capitalization
if
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the government do not encourage financially artwork for citizens, it will
also
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impact
on
Change preposition
apply
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the reputation of
country
Correct article usage
the country
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. Because
,
Punctuation problem
apply
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most countries are renowned
with
Change preposition
for
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their artworks like sculptures, pottery and others.
Then
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, it
is
Verb problem
apply
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also
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lead
Correct subject-verb agreement
leads
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to
financial
Correct article usage
a financial
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crisis for
country
Correct article usage
the country
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due to
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not making enough artworks to surprise tourists.
To sum up
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, the government invest in large pieces of
art
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for public illustrate in outdoor places. It is useful not only for the feelings of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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humans but
also
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influence on the country.

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improvement
Your view is clear, but your reasoning is weak and not shown well. Try to give one strong idea per paragraph and connect each idea to the topic.
language
Use simple, short sentences. Check forms and tense to fix basic errors.
improvement
Give real examples or facts to show why art in public space helps people and a country.
content
You state a view clearly.
idea
There is an attempt to link art to country image and to tourists.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite
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