IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

You recently attended a local community event, but you were disappointed with the organization. Write a letter to the event coordinator. In your letter: •describe the problems you experienced during the event •explain how these problems affected your experience •suggest what could be done to improve future events

Dear Sir I hope you are doing well. The purpose of writing
this
Linking Words
 letter is to show dissatisfaction
against
Change preposition
with
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 your services in
recent
Correct article usage
the recent
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 event which I
have
Verb problem
apply
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experienced
this
Linking Words
 Sunday. To commence with, despite
being
Verb problem
apply
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having the tickets and all the verified documents ,
me
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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and my friends
Correct word order
my friends and
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were
Correct pronoun usage
I were
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 kept waiting for over an hour. After getting
entered
Punctuation problem
entered,
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 there were no proper arrangements of food and liquor , waiters and bartenders were not using gloves
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 they were serving so dirty.
Additionally
Linking Words
, these issues did not cost me my time
but
Punctuation problem
, but
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gave
Correct word order
also gave
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 me financial loss
Correct word order
apply
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also
Linking Words
.
As
Change preposition
apply
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I was with my business partners
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 we were there to sign a deal . They all left within 30 minutes because of suffocation they felt
due to
Linking Words
air
Correct article usage
an air
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 conditioner fault in the hall. I would appreciate
if
Correct pronoun usage
it if
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 you could investigate
this
Linking Words
 matter and
can
Verb problem
apply
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hire good contractors for events. So these types of mistakes can be avoided. As a gesture of goodwill , I suggest offering a refund to me and my
team mates
Use the right word
teammates
show examples
 for the inconvenience. Looking forward to hearing from you. Aman

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structure
Use a clear start, list problems, then say how it hits your work.
coherence
Make a new paragraph for each idea and keep one idea per part.
grammar
Use short, calm words and simple grammar. Check big words and commas.
content
You tell what happened and how it affects your deal.
purpose
You ask for a fix and a plan for the future.

The Closing

The style of the letter determine how you have to close it.

Check out the suggested closing sentences for each type of letter in the General IELTS Test. The closing sentence should be the last sentence of your letter.

Formal style (To someone you have not met, whose name you don’t know)

  • Yours faithfully,

Semi-formal (To someone you may or may not have met, whose last name you know)

  • Yours sincerely,

Informal (To someone you know well, whose first name you know and use)

  • Best regards,
  • Warm wishes,

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