IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

Many people today are worried about cybercrime, chess hacking and identity theft. What problems does cybercrime cause, and what solutions can you suggest for ordinary people and businesses to take?

Cybercrime
Use synonyms
 can be a threat to many people,
while
Linking Words
 some are already aware of
Use synonyms
cybercrime
Punctuation problem
cybercrime,
show examples
 there
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
also
Linking Words
 a concerning amount of citizens who have yet to understand the potential danger of
cybercrime
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 essay will discuss the problems of
cybercrime
Use synonyms
 and the possible solutions to prevent or stop
cybercrime
Use synonyms
 from happening. To address
this
Linking Words
 situation,
cybercrime
Use synonyms
 is a type of theft
that is
Linking Words
 caused by the use of the internet to steal
information
Use synonyms
 from users who
were
Wrong verb form
have been
show examples
 hacked
,
Punctuation problem
. This
show examples
this
Linking Words
 can lead to identity theft and
information
Use synonyms
 loss.
Therefore
Linking Words
, the hacker can sell
this
Linking Words
information
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the black market or impersonate the person
whom
Correct word order
from whom
show examples
 they stole the
information
Use synonyms
from
Correct word order
apply
show examples
. The duration of the hacking process could be quick and hard to notice
so
Punctuation problem
, so
show examples
 the owner of the
information
Use synonyms
 would not have enough time to protect it. Though
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 users can install antivirus software to prevent
this
Linking Words
 from happening, antivirus software has the ability to detect and identify
information
Use synonyms
 that has been installed via the internet
, now
Punctuation problem
. Now
show examples
 the users will be able to protect and secure their
information
Use synonyms
 from an unknown source that might be threatening to the user's data. In conclusion,
cybercrime
Use synonyms
 can pose
danger
Correct article usage
a danger
show examples
 to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
but
Punctuation problem
, but
show examples
 preventing
cybercrime
Use synonyms
 from occurring is possible
due to
Linking Words
 the support of today’s antivirus software or
application
Fix the agreement mistake
applications
show examples
.

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task response
Add more detail on the problems that cybercrime causes and how it hurts people and firms.
coherence
Put ideas in clear blocks: one on problems, one on solutions for people, and one for business.
cohesion
Use simple linking words to show flow: first, also, then, finally.
lexis
Choose exact, not repeat, words and give small, real examples like fake emails or lost money.
grammar
Check grammar and sentence form; keep tenses and subject-verb agreement correct.
strength
The essay has a clear topic about cybercrime and its harm.
structure
There is an introduction and a short conclusion.
language
The language is simple and easy to read.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • cybercrime
  • identity theft
  • hacking
  • business
  • trust
  • internet
  • financial loss
  • protection
  • victim
  • emotional stress
  • data
  • reputation
  • legal issues
  • solutions
  • ordinary people
  • customers
  • banking
  • online services
  • shopping
  • safety
What to do next:
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