Schools should give up using books, which makes children feel boring, they should use films, video games, computers instead.To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In today`s fast-paced world, everyone
think
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thinks
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that
school
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schools
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should quit
books
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, which makes
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
boring
Correct word choice
bored
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,
instead
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they should shift towards
films
Use synonyms
, games and laptops. In my opinion,
books
Use synonyms
are worthy for studying, as
books
Use synonyms
are
Correct article usage
a treditional
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treditional
Correct your spelling
traditional
method of
study
Use synonyms
,
as
Correct word choice
and
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advance
Replace the word
advanced
show examples
methods may distract
students
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and may create health problems for
students
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.
To begin
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with, the public says
students
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need
advance
Replace the word
advanced
show examples
technology for
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study
Replace the word
studying
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in schools.
Due to
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this
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,
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this
Correct determiner usage
apply
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modern instruments
such
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as computers and
films
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can provide
visual
Correct article usage
a visual
show examples
experience to pupils, but
this
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may increase their screen time, which may cause eyesight failure in future.
Moreover
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,
this
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can distract
students
Use synonyms
, as they can be addicted to
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
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. and may
encorage
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encourage
them to watch negative movies and they possibly
loose
Use the right word
lose
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their focus
from
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on studying
show examples
study
Use synonyms
.
For example
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, there was
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
research done by Western Sydney University which says
students
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who
studying
Wrong verb form
study
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online
they
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apply
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have
50
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a 50
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per cent chance
to lose
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of losing
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their vision.
In addition
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, some people believe that schools should shift their trend from
books
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to
films
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.
As a result
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,
books
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are
historical
Correct article usage
a historical
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method of knowledge,
while
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films
Use synonyms
and
internet
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the internet
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are new
source
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sources
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of information, so the public
consider
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considers
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the
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apply
show examples
books
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as
an
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apply
show examples
authentic data,
while
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online E-
books
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have reported missing data, in many cases.
Furthermore
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,
books
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have limited and key information to share and it is never going off topic, so there are
less
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fewer
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chances of distraction for pupils, and it is not
depnding
Correct your spelling
dependent
on factors
such
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as internet speed and connectivity.
For instance
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, there was an article in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
the Times of India which mentioned
books
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are more beneficial for
students
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, online
study
Use synonyms
and movies may impact
nagetively
Correct your spelling
negatively
for society. In conclusion,
books
Use synonyms
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
accurate and correct data and
is
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are
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not unhealthy
such
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as
screen
Fix the agreement mistake
screens
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,
that
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which
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i
Fix capitalization
I
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am convinced that online modes of
study
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in schools may encourage
students
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for negative behaviour.

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task
State your view clearly at the start and keep a steady position through the essay.
task
Develop each point with a clear reason and add simple examples that support it.
coherence
Use topic sentences for each paragraph and link ideas with simple connectors (and, but, also, then).
language
Check grammar and spelling, fix errors in subject-verb and plural forms.
structure
Keep to one idea per paragraph and use punctuation to show pauses.
strength
Clear view on the topic is stated in the introduction
strength
Some attempt to link ideas with connectors
strength
Conclusion includes a summary and restates stance

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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